The Resolution...

And this year ended on the exact note it began and how it ended last year.It was filled with so much drama,I couldn't quite believe I was starring it in.Let's bring it back to January,things were slow.Then February came and things started picking up,I found something to believe in and place my two feet back in the sky.Soon,it fell apart again and March was spent in disbelief as to how things went so wrong.From April onwards,I had a new life.Poly started and although I don't think I have very much of a life there either,at least I had something to fill my days.I spent the months enjoying my alone time as much as I could,sure crushes came along every now and then but nothing progressed in the end.If there was something I was attached to,it was probably to the band,the commitment level more than tripled even though it has always been at 100% before.And December came along and blew me away.Just when I thought the year will end on a high,it spiralled just as suddenly.And I'm back on the ground with my feet firmly rooted and not picking up speed anytime soon.

Unlike last year,this year wasn't remembered for the regrets.I would never have changed anything or wanted to change anything that happened in fact,I would like to relive the year if I could.It's been an interesting year filled with so much hope and anticipation.Disappointments and cruelty too but everyday was special in it's own right even if it's just spending the whole day just lazing on my bed and doing nothing particular.I've discovered so much about myself and I'm extremely proud of whatever I've achieved and done.I couldn't be more amazed at myself and it's always great to have people around me who share the same joy I felt may it be my loving family or my crazy bunch of friends who became inspirations in my life.

If there is one thing I can be sure,it's got to be the fact that I've mellowed my rather eccentric temperament and emotion.I may have moments which made me really down but I will never be out and I will always bounce back better than before.I've experienced a lot of losing.Lovers,friends,would-be friends,my possessions and myself even.It has always been hard to take but that's life isn't it?As much as it is a cliche excuse,life lessons have always easier to take even if it means lying to oneself just to make one feel better.I will take things on the chin because if things were to turn out differently,it would sooner or later.If this is what people call maturity then I must say that age is finally catching up with me,if it isn't then I'm still thinking like a kid which can be a good thing anyway.

Love is not a feeling,it's an ability-Marty Barasco from the movie Dan In Real Life.And I'm proud to say that not one bit talented at it.Love has a funny way of filling my stomach with so much butterflies that I start choking over my own words and that can be frustrating at times.And then there are moments in which I thought that I was in control,truth is I can never be in control.It's either love is to unpredictable or I'm just not reading the cards and cues right.I guess I like to be in love,even if it's only temporary because I like the thrills and chills it gives me.I'd hop on the joyride any day if ever a chance came along but I've never been lucky.And this year's incidents ended on a similar way it did last year,I don't seem to learn don't I?It's funny come to think of it but we'll see how if the new year brings about a new fortune for me since my luck's been pretty much cursed.

Anyway,my new year resolution will be slightly different as to my previous years'.As long as I can remember,they've always been specific things based on events which I wanted to undo or unwrong.Since this year has been all about "change" and "yes, we can",I shall keep true to it until next year at the very least.My new year resolution will be not plan or predict what's ahead of me but to plan to be surprised by the turns of the upcoming events.Life's too short to think too far ahead anyway.

This paragraph goes out to everyone that I'd like to thank for making a difference in my life through whatever ways.My favourite boys of the band,EugeneLim whom I've had the privilege of 'gay-ing' with since our secondary school days and ultimate jokes that cracked me up.RyanChang who still amazes me with his photography skills and contribution to the band.LiuJialin, who's wackiness and antics never fails to amuse me regardless of how irritating they may be.BryanSethUlricSantaMaria,the coolest boy in the band who brings such enthusiasm and rejuvenated new life into the SavingSomeone.KathleenDavid who's seen the best and ugliest side of me and I'm still surprised that we are still friends wait,are we?KimberlyWong who will always be this bubbly girl that share my taste in music and given me my first hoodie.Hanis,the lost but not forgotten friend who has been a listening ear during my darkest period of my life and made my day just by being there for me.I hope you're doing fine wherever you are and we really need to catch up soon.My SP friends who've made school less boring and draggy.LauraLisa for the past month of pure euphoria and many more to come.You'll always be a song to remember and a day late friend.To all the bands that have inspired me to pursue my interest in music and made me believe in dreams.And lastly to all the inspirations which allowed me to pen to words.Oh yes,my pencil and black book for holding the secrets,memories and lessons in life that I can proudly hold to remember for the rest of my life.Apologies to those I've missed out,my mind has run out of fuel.

Happy New Year dear readers and I hope 2009 brings about a new meaning to life.


I need light in the dark as I search for the resolution...


There's a lot that I don't know
There's a lot that I'm still learning
But I think I'm letting go
To find my body it's still burning

And you hold me down
And you got me living in the past
Come on and pick me up
Somebody clear the wreckage from the blast

Yeah, I'm alive
But I don't need a witness
To know that I survived
I'm not looking for forgiveness
Yeah, I just need light
I need light in the dark as I search for the resolution

And the bars are finally closed
So I try living in the moment
Til the moment it just froze
And I felt sick and so alone

I can hear the sound
Of your voice still ringing in my ear
I'm going underground
But you'll find me anywhere I feel

That I'm alive
But I don't need a witness
To know that I survived
I'm not looking for forgiveness
Yeah, I just need light
I need light in the dark as I search for the resolution
I need light in the dark as I search for the resolution

(Tomorrow back from hell)
Resolution
(Some stories I will never tell)
Resolution
(And yeah,I'm almost home)
Resolution

And you hold me down
And you hold me down

Yeah, I'm alive
But I don't need a witness
To know that I survived
I'm not looking for forgiveness

Yeah, I'm alive
And I don't need a witness
To know that I survived
I'm not looking for forgiveness
I just need light
I need light in the dark as I search for the resolution
I need light in the dark as I search for the resolution
I need light, I need light

(Light in the dark as I search for the resolution)
Resolution
(Light in the dark as I search for the resolution)
Resolution
(Light in the dark as I search for the resolution)
Resolution...


The Resolution by Jack's Mannequin.