What You Want...

I've got a list of suitable gifts that Santa can give me for Christmas this year along with reasons for asking for them.Number one on my list will be a bass guitar.I'll prefer a Pete Wentz Precision Fender which I've not seen in person anywhere as yet.All I see is from pictures and that either means that it's not going to be shipped unless I ordered online which will then cost a bomb.I wouldn't even mind a Les Paul Epiphone bass because that really accompanies by guitar well since they're both Les Pauls and that will be really sexy.Actually I wouldn't even mind any Fender Precision so long as it's black.If I can pick the colour then I'll want a mixture of red,black and white.I need the bass guitar badly because I want to save $5 each time I rent it at *scape.Also,I'm going to need it during my first gig and I need a bass guitar that has the word me all over it because I feel like a cheapskate having to borrow all the time.The only reason why you won't get me one is probably because you very well know I'm not going to practise using it because I prefer practising with my normal six-stringed guitar and will only use it during jamming sessions and gigs.

Next on my list will be an Xbox 360 or a Playstation 3.See,my house is getting really boring without the high end gadgets that's selling all the cool games.I'm starting to get sick of just playing Winning Eleven 9 throughout the whole holiday and possibly,until the console actually had enough and crashed.It's outdated and I want the likes of Teves and Nani in my team not Van Nistelrooy or Liam Miller.Besides,I keep winning.I'm getting bored already.Having a new console and the latest games will mean I can get to test myself again and entertain me.I'll then have to start again from scratch in learning how to conquer the game and that will take the time that I spend at home.The only reason you won't get me either of this is probably because you know how much junks these games can fill my brain witha nd how much time I'll spend to end a particular game or the entire time I'm hooked onto the games.Of course there's always the fear of not getting the grades next year because I'm always playing my games.

Third on my list will be getting my own laptop with lots and lots of memory space so I can fill them up with my music library.My bro has been complaining about how much memory I have used for both my computers and the fact that all my new songs have to be stored at the other computer which has no internet access and I spend lesser time with.It's basically a games computer so I don't really use it unless I have a sudden urge to play games like Sims 2,Civilisation IV and Company Of Heroes.If I get my laptop,not only can I use it to fill in my songs,I'll use it to access the internet and do my own things.It will basically be my own private area and I'll lock it with my own password so noone other me can use it.It'll make things so much easier since my mom might want to use this computer every now and again to play mini games like Zuma and Insaniquarium.I'll then use my laptop to access the internet plus I get to listen to every single songs in my collection.The only reason you won't get me a laptop will be the fact that I still have two computers and I'm still able to cope and I don't need it desperately.You can take your time in giving me a laptop so long as you get it before both ym computer crashes and I lose any song in my library.

A Billy Martin PRS will be next on my list.It's my dream guitar and I'm sure you know how badly I want it because having it now will mean no more spending on getting anymore guitar unless it gets spoilt for any reason and it can't be fixed.It's black and carbon just the way I like it and the bat at the twelfth fret is whoa.It'll be real neat if you can even get it autographed by Billy Martin himself.He's my favourite guitarist to date even though he isn't Eric Clapton or Santana standard.It's his personality,his taste in guitars and his music that I like most.No need for breathtaking solos,I just need a guy who's down to earth and play something that I can play along to.The only reason you won't get it for me will be the fact that I still have my Epiphone and you don't see a need to get another guitar since my Les Paul is good enough.I can't deny that fact but I'm hoping I'll be lucky enough to have both.But I'm satisfied enough if you feel I'm not worthy to get the PRS yet,I still love my Epiphone.

Let's see,what did I miss.Oh,an iPod classic.I don't think I need it so desperately just yet but oh my gosh,it looks damn cool.Especially since it's black and it's carbon.I love the feeling of touching the material.Plus the cool new features inside like the split screen cd cover and the extra memory.My iPod now is doing well,I've never dropped it and it's scratch free.That's how much care I put into it because it's a very precious gadget.No harm in getting two right?I'll probably give my old one to my bro if he wants or even sell it.The extra memory will help me feel more secure since mine is currently more than half full although some might argue that it's only more than half while theirs have already gone over the limit.I'm not going to complain if I'm not getting it no matter how cool looking it is because I still have mine.Once it dies on me then I'll have to desperately seek another one and iPod classic will be the first one on the must get mp4 list.

Of course this list will never be complete without cds,cds and more cds.I'm going to need a whole day to list every single albums that I'm looking for.I'm sure my collection will make Hmv blush in shame looking at their own collection but then again,I don't have as much storage space in my house as compared to Hmv's warehouse.Actually I don't even need as much space as them because I just need a copy of each album unlike them which needs a few copies per album so I think I'm going to need much lesser space than they do.The only reason I won't get it this year is the fact that I've gotten a lot of cds this year.I think I actually spent more money on cds than anything else and I've gotten more cds this year than I actually did before this year's compiled together.I dare say that this year's collection has been more hits than misses unlike last time when I buy cds hoping they'll sound good or I'm buying it for the sake of one song.I'll make sure I sampled through them before buying anything just to be sure it's worth my money since money is what I lacked the most.

I can barely contain my excitement for Christmas this year for some reason.My Christmas tree is up already and though it's considered pretty minute I like it,it'll be less messy and much easier to put up,bring down and decorate.And the fact that my dad will be counting down to 2008 like he normally does every year.It has become some kind of ritual that we'll wait by the television and have a pop at a bottle of sparkles.That's the closest thing we ever get to popping champagne,or maybe we can even try that this year.


There's plenty more that I want to get before the year ends but for things that only money can buy,this is what I want...


I want something
More than all my possessions
Something I want to share with everybody else
It will be brilliant
Both to elderly and children
And be different in a way that can be embraced

If this is what you want
Then I'm gonna get it to you
Cause I want to show you the things
That you never knew
(That you never knew)
If this is what you want
I'll get closer to you
And then I'll make you sing
Cause that's what you do

So was it worth it
The way I had it worded
Seems like I bit off a little more than I could chew
I've got a big mouth
Yeah but maybe that's true
I could never know for sure until it gets to you

If this is what you want
Then I'm gonna get it to you
Cause I want to show you the things
That you never knew
(That you never knew)
If this is what you want
I'll get closer to you
And then I'll make you sing
Cause that's what you do

I want to make you feel better
About the bet that you've made
The bet you've placed on the lonely boys
From the Keystone state
Was it worth it?
It's only gonna get better
I think we're gonna be safe
If we can keep holding on and on
To hope for this long

If this is what you want
It's what I'm gonna get to you
Cause I want to show you the things
That you never knew
(That you never knew)
If this is what you want
I'll get closer to you
And then I'll make you sing
Cause that's what you do...


What You Want by The Starting Line.

Belief...

Today was awesome.Jamming at *scape was like getting high on drugs.Though it was tiring as hell,it was insanely fun because we did what we set out to do which is to re-record every of our songs and record them decently.Finally got the recordings from Ryan and sampled through each of them twice.Though there were some mistakes here and there,I feel that it's good enough to be used as our official demo.I'm getting blanks cds from Jingyi who has agreed to sponsor us and for that we're grateful.Sadly,our demo will only be limited and we're keeping the rest for future use.We'll only give them to a few lucky people.I'm only giving mine to people who either appreciates music or supports what we're doing.Razi will get a special one from us of course.I'm also glad that someone other than me and my band mates liked 12 Used To Be My Lucky Number,it's a good feeling.





















Jialin running at the speed of light.




















And he became a tech geek.




















I feel empowered by this picture somehow.




















Blurred.















Our attempt to copy Anberlin's Blueprints For The Black Market's cd cover.















Attack!















Taken last week,the glow effect.


We decided not to rush our works so we're taking things slowly now.No gigs until we're ready for them although we can probably bring Redbar down,we're aiming for a bigger stage.Who knows we might even be showcasing our stuff at *scape itself.That will be an awesome experience.But then again,it'll be useless if there's noone watching either.I'm sure Razi will help us out.He said we have improved but we still have a long way to go.We need to be tighter and get so used to playing the songs that we're sick of playing them.We got some recognition from him since he keep emphasising that he like What You Want Is Not What You Need and he was singing the melodies without even listening to the song fully.Guess we're lucky we found him and he liked our music.There's no better compliment than that.Let's just continue to work hard and use the next week break to relax ourselves before we continue pursuing our first gig which many have been asking me about since to them it's taking far too long.Be patient because every extra day you wait will mean an even more exciting stuff to look forward to when you see us performing.


Put some belief in us and we'll make it happen...


Is there anyone who
Ever remembers
Changing there mind from
The paint on a sign
Is there anyone who
Really recalls
Ever breaking rank at all
For something someone yelled real loud one time

Oh everyone believes
In how they think it ought to be
Oh everyone believes
And they're not going easily

Belief is a beautiful armor
But makes for the heaviest sword
Like punching under water
You never can hit who you're trying for
Some need the exhibition
And some have to know they tried
It's the chemical weapon
For the war that's raging on inside

Oh everyone believes
From emptiness to everything
Oh everyone believes
And no ones going quietly

We're never gonna win the world
We're never gonna stop the war
We're never gonna beat this
If belief is what we're fighting for

We're never gonna win the world
We're never gonna stop the war
We're never gonna beat this
If belief is what we're fighting for

Is there anyone
Who can remember
Ever surrender
With their life on the line

We're never gonna win the world
We're never gonna stop the war
We're never gonna beat this
If belief is what we're fighting for

We're never gonna win the world
We're never gonna stop the war
We're never gonna beat this
If belief is what we're fighting for

What puts a hundred thousand children in the sand
Belief can
Belief can
What puts the folded flag inside his mother's hand
Belief can
Belief can...


Belief by John Mayer.

Brave...

Had a little talk with Eugene about the band and we agreed that this SavingSomeone Project is consuming alot of resources.However,we agreed that no matter how tiring it is or resource-depleting it is,we're going to do it for one thing and one thing only.It is to be doing something that we can be proud of.For me personally,it's not about getting money or fame.What I want to achieve is something that I can look back on in the future and say how proud I was of what I've done.Of course that's for the future.For now,I just want to repay the faith that my dad has instilled me with by buying me my first guitar.I need to show the people around me that I can do something that I want to and I just need them to trust what I'm doing.My mom protested when I told my dad that I wanted to buy a guitar.

Her reason was simple,why get me an electric guitar when I can use an acoustic which is cheaper and does the same thing.My bro thinks that I'll quit halfway and waste my money buying a guitar when I could've utilised it better buying some other things.But my dad decided to get me an Epiphone Les Paul Special II which though isn't very expensive,still costed quite a bit.And I have my reasons for getting an electric straight away when everyone told me to get an acoustic or a classical since I'm a beginner.I'm not going to mention the reason why but I can very much tell you that that exact reason got me enjoying learning to play the guitar.After so long being the underachiever of the family and undermined by my supposed potential in academic,I wanted to break out from my shell and be the person I want to be,not one that others told me to be.I don't think I have a natural gift of music but what I do have was the interest and that pushed me forward.

I guess noone expected much of me anyway,they'll probably think guitar is just something I'll chuck in one corner after I found myself a new toy but I proved everyone wrong didn't I.Not only did I not chuck it aside,I actually utilised it fully and I'm at a stage where I can showcase whatever I have to the world.Having the demo and then the gig,that'll be some dream.And then when I look at the crowd,I see familiar faces.My friends who's been supportive of me and hopefully,the wide grin on my parents' faces.That's what I've always wanted to do,make my parents proud of me.It doesn't matter what I do but I guess I've failed for the past 16 years so now is the time for me to achieve what I've always aimed to achieve.Just for them to look at me and tell me that they're proud of what I do and be supportive of my actions.That would be the perfect ending.For now,let's just be brave somehow...


I am not as brave
Beautiful and patient as you are
But I am safe
In your arms I listen as you say
"I'm proud of who you've become
And the person you will be tomorrow"
And I know I would give anything up for you

I'll follow through
I promise to hold on
I'll never let go
Won't let you down
If you can stay proud
I'll be brave somehow

I am not that brave
Sometimes I need to hear you whisper
"Everything's okay, you'll be fine
I'll help you find your way"
And I have
Nothing but faith in you
All that I am is what you are and we are
I would give anything up for you

I'll follow through
I promise to hold on
I'll never let go
Won't let you down
If you can stay proud
I'll be brave somehow

Whisper, you can save me
I am listening
I am waiting
For your best to come alive
Help me understand the reasons why
I'm here now
Living a feeling unlike my fear
Outside of this life I am here now for you

I'll follow through
I promise to hold on
I'll never let go
Won't let you down
If you can stay proud
I'll be brave and

I will follow you
I promise to hold on
I'll never let go
Won't let you down
If you can stay proud
I'll be brave somehow
Somehow
Somehow...


Brave by Gavin Mikhail.

We've Got A Big Mess On Our Hands...

Made up for yesterday's rotting period by doing something worthy of praises,I helped to clean the house.Yes,Edwin the lazybum has actually cleared all the books that's been either used in school or bought for nothing and packed them up neatly at the storeroom though I would have wanted to burn it all.Gone are the books that's chucked untidily at my bedroom and the table closest to entrance of the house because that's where I piled most of my jnuks after school and so on.Now that it's cleared up,I can breathe in fresher air and obviously the house is much cleaner.Next it was clearing the rubbish at the storeroom that's not been cleaned for a long long time.Help my mom to mop the floor too and for once,I felt useful at home.I've been contributing to the pollution at home so I'm doing my fair share to at least do something to help my mom who's been doing all the cleaning since morning.I can only say that what I've done is only a tiny contribution to what she's done.

Once I was done I actually switched my new computer on and stared at the screen not doing anything.Ok maybe I did,I just listened to some of the songs that's in the computer and looked at every single photo I have in the computer.Enjoying the music and re-living each moment for every single photo taken.Reminds me of the good life I have then,not saying I'm not having a good life now but it's different,I'm sure you get what I'm trying to say.And looking at how I grew up from my bad hair day and all to some total fashion disasters even until today but it was worse then,to me at least.Then ordered pizza so that my mom won't have to tire herself further from cooking and watched The Universe on History Channel.

Was looking up the net a while ago and found something interesting http://www.myspace.com/dougdoes.I watched the video he did for Dance,Dance and found it pretty cool.He's actually jazzing and lounging to some of the big acts like Fall Out Boy,Panic! At The Disco,The Academy Is... and Cobra Starship.Not only does it help us listen to the words of the songs clearly since Patrick Stump pretty much mumbled the lyrics throughout the whole song and we couldn't catch a thing he's saying other than well,Dance,Dance.The lesson learnt is this,that anyone can cover any songs and re-do them into any genre he wants to as long as he made into into his own.Re-inventing the song into one's own style.That's something that I don't mind doing myself,pretty much like what Dharma did under his other profile Mister 28 at MySpace.There you get to actually listen to him covering songs like Hey Ya by Outkast and making it less annoying and more enjoyable depending on your taste.


So goodbye to the big mess on our hands,or rather house...


(Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah)
(Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah)
I've got that lefty curse
Where everything I do is flipped
And awkwardly reversed
You're seldom known and barely missed
I always put myself
In destructive situations
I need oxygen
To be exposed where no one goes
Where no one's been
When it all comes crashing

(Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah)
Now we've got a big, big
Mess on our hands tonight
Sing it (yeah)
(Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah)
Now we've got a big, big
Mess on our hands tonight

Somebody get my phone
So I can throw it in a public
Pool and watch it float
And as it slowly sinking down
Become a social ghost
Inside a box, cut at the top
To let some light shine in
To remind me what I’ve done
And where I've been
When it all comes crashing

(Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah)
Now we've got a big, big
Mess on our hands tonight
Sing it (yeah)
(Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah)
Now we've got a big, big, big, big
Mess on our hands, on our hands

Don't give in, don’t give up
I'll be gone
You don't look innocent enough
We're too young to be critics
We won't miss anything at all
Don't give in, don’t give up
I don't look innocent with this big, big mess on
I'll say something else

(Woah)
(Woah)
(Woah oh)

We've got a big, big mess
Oh, we've got a big, big mess
Oh, we've got a big, big mess
A big, big mess
Now we've got a big, big mess
A big, big mess
Now come on

(Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah)
Now we've got a big, big
Mess on our hands tonight
Sing it (yeah)
(Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah)
Now we've got a big, big, big, big
Mess on our hands, on our hands

Don't give in, don’t give up
(We've got a big, big mess)
I’ll be gone
(A big, big mess)
I don't look innocent enough
We're too young to be cynics
(We've got a big, big mess on our hands)
We won’t wish any harm at all
(We've got a big, big mess)
Don't give in, don’t give up
No one looks innocent
(A big, big mess)
With this big, big mess on our hands tonight
(We've got a big, big mess on our hands)
When it all comes crashing...


We've Got A Big Mess On Our Hands by The Academy Is...

Headlines Read Out...

Went to Funan early yesterday since my bro had just finished his last paper for his A's and he's celebrating with buying Company Of Heroes.I just wanted to go for the Starbucks but apparently,it's taken over by TCC and so thee goes my caffeine fix.Lunched at Sakae before heading to Ryan's place where I caught up with Eezzat,Jialin,YongSiang,Hakim and Clement.We played Fifa 06,it's outdated I know but we had fun.And then followed by Winning Eleven 9 where by me and Eezzat teamed up to win twice and lost once.We used Palermo and that's when our giant killing spree started but it ended when YongSiang and Hakim won us using Real Madrid on penalties.Junked on chips and coke.Went back after that for dinner.

Today was just hilarious.I was awaken by my alarm clock at 10 but somehow,I fell asleep again and realised my mistake at 1145.I rushed out,bathed and prepared myself and left without my brunch.Supposed to meet Ryan and Jialin at Bugis at 1230 but I reached at close to 1.Lunched at Food Junction because other shops selling food are either too expensive or fast food which I've been trying to reduce consumption.Walked to RedBar after that to catch Elliot and his band Grace The Occasion's gig.We checked the place out for a while as we wait for Kathleen and Elliot to show up.It looks really sleazy and all but I don't mind playing there since they actually get paid playing.Grace The Occasion got the ball rolling with 5 cover songs and an original.I was a little surprised by his song choice actually because if you remember,we performed during the confirmation gathering sometime this year and I thought he'll pick songs that are somewhere around there.And from Youtube videos,I thought they'll be a little more current in that sense.

I think they did alright since they were to show some consistency and they used their background experience in trying to get the crowds going.They sound like a typical rock and roll band and I was short of experiencing culture shock of some kind.Elliot's voice totally changed and one can actually mistake his talking voice to sound something like that but it really isn't.His talking voice can often be mistaken as being too whiny but his singing voice is totally the opposite.And his performance was saved thanks to the lead guitarist.I don't think it went the way he wanted it to be but if you compare it to the next two,I'll say his was the best.Next up was this band called Sobb without the drummer whom I'm told is either in probation or jail or at home.We first saw them covering Crushcrushcrush by Paramore on Monday at Simei and we didn't realise that they were actually having their gig here too.

My first thought was thinking that this Sobb having a paid gig there meant that they were better than us.How wrong was I!I was cursing to myself the moment they begin and cheered the moment they left the stage.Altogether they covered four songs which left me Godsmacked for all the wrong reason.The vocalist was off key.I can probably do better with the guitar than the keyboardist/guitarist and I myself am pathetic enough already.And the bassist,what can I say,he's hopeless.Their performance was probably a mistake right from the start and if I were the band memeber,I'll be so ashamed of it that I'll cover my face with paperbag and sing like Johnny Shameless And His Minions.At least,Johnny Shameless can play a proper song no matter how vulgar it is and though,it's not considered a song,it was still more rocking than this.

I realised the power of links then,it's like this band isn't good enough yet they had a gig which made me wonder how lucky they were to have links of people who owned the place or whatever.They were hopeless yet they had a gig under their belt unlike us but we very know that we'll get our gig sooner or later anyway,it's only a matter of time so we're just following Razi the Godfather's advice.It's not about having many gigs,but how many quality ones so we'll have to make sure we're 100% prepared.And then,we'll set Singapore by storm and win support gig by gig.I may sound cocky or overconfident but I really believe SavingSomeone has got what it takes.

Watched a couple of songs from the third band before giving up and we left the place to play pool at a nearby place with Elliot joining us.We split 2 tables between us SavingSomeone without Eugene at one table and Elliot,Kimberly and Kathleen at the other.Played a few games and I lost my touch again so the hour was a totaly embarrassment.But it's definitely better than Sobb since I did get a few balls in.Oh yeah,we made even more jokes about them calling them 'Para-less' since we saw them covering on Monday and other stupid names.At least I got a complimentary drink so that wasn't so bad an experience.Kathleen,Kimberly and Elliot left early leaving us to end the game before we went our separate ways.

And we left Bugis thinking how lucky we are that SavingSomeone can actually make much better music in that sense and how pathetic some other bands are.That was morale boosting and we're definitely out to prove a point that we can do a better job than them so hopefully we'll get a chance to showcase our music soon.I don't think there will be many people who has heard us so we're going to call every single one of our friends and contacts to watch us and hopefully,it'll grow from there.But hey,reality check let's just practise and practise until we can play every song with our eyes closed and play the songs backwards.And get the demo made as soon as possible.From there,there'll be more opportunities for gigs.

The stage is set for you to make your debut, and the audience is crowded with fans.Coincidentally this is what I read from my horoscope for today which has been pretty reliable with the past few 'fortune-telling' sessions.

One day the headlines will read out the story about us...


Stay for a moment
And I promise that I will be different
And you'll see me
Wait, wait and I'll show you
There is more to this if you will listen
And you'll soon believe

Extra extra
Hear me now

I am not the kind that will hide
Beneath the lights
And the lyrical one-liners
I can't stand the hype
And I am not the kind that will lie
Between the lines of love
And faking it all for these
Headlines read out,whoa

Stay for a moment
I'll be the biggest bet with greater odds
Than you have ever seen
Wait, Wait
Someone stop me now
Cause I don't think I can hold this down for you
You'll see me

Extra extra
Hear me now

I am not the kind that will hide
Beneath the lights
And the lyrical one-liners
I can't stand the hype
And I am not the kind that will lie
Between the lines of love
And faking it all for these
Headlines read out,whoa

Can't you can't you see that this is the proof you need
Can't you can't you see that this is what we all need

I am not the kind that will hide
Beneath the lights
And the lyrical one-liners
I can't stand the hype
And I am not the kind that will lie
Between the lines of love
And faking it all for these
Headlines read out,whoa...


Headlines Read Out... by We The Kings.

The Truth Is...

Jammed at Scape today for three solid hours and had a small talk with Razi who has great advice for us.He might get us a one song gig for the soft launch of the Scape Studio and boy do we feel proud of that.He's in love with What You Want Is Not What You Need.Now we've got the support we badly needed and he's got the recipe for our success so it's really up to us to follow them wisely.We're going to need the 90% hardwork and you can be sure we'll be working our butts off every jamming session to improve at any cost.And when we finally get our first gig,that'll be the proudest moment of my life to date.But hey,let's be realistic.One step at a time so we're just being patient about it.When it's time,it's time so don't rush it.

Had truckloads of fun and the new song is challenging.It's called Break The Speed Down because of how we keep changing the tempo of the song and also we take the word Break from the song's chorus.Razi gave his approval too although it's our first time hearing that song ourselves so that's definitely a good sign.We definitely like the atmosphere of the Scape Studio,it made us more relaxed and yet more productive.Alicia came with donuts,thanks Alicia appreciate it loads.And Jingyi came too for the last half an hour from work.Went Inokii to order my next cd target with my last 10 dollar note in my savings,felt damn heart pain.But The Rocket Summer is worth it.

Took 36 and there was this violent man at one of the bus stop who kicked the bus door for like no reason.We were like,'what the hell is this guy doing man?'I mean,people are getting out so wait patiently so there's space to fit him but he chose to kick the door like non-stop and it ended up that the bus didn't even open the door and left the bus stop as soon as all the passengers who wanted to alight actually alighted.Then he gave that stare as the bus leaves and mouthed something,probably some profanities.It was quite hilarious but at the same time,it's quite scary to see someone so violent for no reason whatsoever.

So anyway,Jingyi and I dropped off at the Marine Parade Library bus stop and walked to East Coast Park for my 'surprise'.Planned to sit at the Wavebreakers but in the end decided not to because it was pitch dark and it was filled with people.Settled for Burger King in the end which is so much less packed than Mac.Gave her the 'surprise' and she opened it like a small girl opening her first Christmas present.Then it was awkward silence for a while as we're all tomato red.Everything went back to normal againa nd we made our way home.Walked through the overhead near Victoria Jc and walked her to the bus stop before I headed home feeling damn tired partly because of all the carrying of my guitar.And not forgetting the 3 hours of standing and another hour and a half of walking.But it was all worth it in the end although it didn't really turn out the way I wanted it to.It was good enough.


I'm happy with how the way things flow so smoothly.The truth is,I'll be nothing without everyone...


The truth is, you know
I'm having a moment right now
Where everything makes sense
I think some feeling
From a sliding, smooth guitar would shred right now
And all those nights I lost
By thinking way too hard and long
I finally realised
Just by adding some deep end, I feel alright

The truth is, you know
We could never find a better friend to work with
You make us feel at home
It would make me so happy
Right now to hear some piano being played
By my oldest friend
And all those nights I lost
By thinking way too hard and long
I finally realised
hat I need some drums cracking, and I feel fine

The truth is, my love
That I love you so much that it hurts, oh
And as cheesy as I sound
I've been practicing for the moment when I do, oh I do
And all those nights I lost
By thinking way too hard and long
I finally realised
As long as I have you, I'll be alright

The truth is, you know
I'd be nothing without everyone, oh...


The Truth Is by The Early November.

Lazy Day Afternoon...

Today was rotting day.Or a loser day in Kimberly's language.Woke up and half the day is gone,slacked,stoned and many other actions that I'll normally be caught dead doing in a normal school day.It's only been two weeks and it's already taking it's tolls on me.I find home awfully boring when I've got nothing to do and I rather spend time outside,it's just that I have no idea where to go because Singapore is so small.Also,the fact that my hand is always itching to get more and more things and I'm spending a lot of money.For that,I felt a pain in my heart everytime I take note and note out of my wallet.

At least the rest of the week is planned out already so I used today as a pre and post resting period.I'll be jamming at Scape tomorrow and probably a while after that somewhere else if Jingyi comes.Thursday will be outing with my family since my brother will then be finished with his A's and he planned to celebrate it at Funan with a game to get and possibly,a cup of Starbucks.I just want the Starbucks that's all since I think it's on my mom.If everything goes well,SavingSomeone will be recording our demo on Friday.So hopefully,we'll get some gigs after that.It's exciting and exhilirating.I'm still free for the weekends,I'm hoping I can come up with something then.I'm hoping it's not going to be just another lazy day afternoon like today...


Nothing's going on, but I don't care
Leave me here, don't take me anywhere
Why should I get up
When I've got nothing to do?
Just another lazy day afternoon

Beautiful day outside, but I don't care
Everything I need I got right here
Why should I go out?
Why should I even move?
Just another lazy day afternoon

Afternoon, when everybody's working
I'd rather be a jerk and lay around
Afternoon, this day is just too perfect
Just another lazy day afternoon

Nothing's going on, but I don't care
Leave me here, don't take me anywhere
Why should I get up
When I've got nothing to do?
Just another lazy day afternoon

Just another lazy day afternoon

Afternoon, when everybody's working
I'd rather be a jerk and lay around
Afternoon, this day is just too perfect
Just another lazy day afternoon

Beautiful day outside, but I don't care
Everything I need I got right here
Why should I go out?
Why should I even move?
Just another lazy day afternoon...


Lazy Day Afternoon by Plain White T's.

The Adventure...

Spent yesterday at Aaron's place after mass.Pool,Xbox,guitar,a pack of cards,unhealthy food and a group of fun people.What more do you want?I lost my first and last game to Steven and Gavin respectively but I won Aaron once and Kathleen thrice.Now that felt good,see Kathleen I told you I'll win.Next will be your brother and you-know-who in soccer.

Anyway,I loved Aaron's place.It's so modern and full of good things to do.I can't believe Aaron doesn't actually use the pool table,Xbox,Xbox 360 and the foosball table.It's almost sinful for me to not touch them if I ever have them at my house.My mom will probably go bonkers because I'll never get my hands off them.Played Halo and got killed by Kimberly many times because she kept running me over with the car although I fragged her just as much but this time with real arms combat.She left early to meet her friends at Simei.Gavin joined us after lunch hour and Kathleen and Steven tried and failed to teach me how to play bridge.Aaron is a maniac with the Rubik's Cube,it's like I swear I don't know whatever he's talking about when he talked about how to make a certain move.That just show how intellectually challenged I am.

Then Kathleen left so we four guys played Fifa Street with me and Aaron playing against Gavin and Steven.Many stupid things happened in the game and it was hilarious.Aaron's sister is so cute.And Aaron's siblings has got wicked names.As in,normally families tend to pick names that somehow has links to each other be it the first letter or whatever but his siblings are all very different.His family is so warm and friendly,I don't mind staying over at their place and crashing a night there.And the garden looks beautiful from on top so it can only be better when I do see it in front of my naked eyes.We junked on Kfc,lays,pratas,brownies and soft drinks so I'm guessing that's another day of my long life reduced.Thanks again Aaron for having this 'pool-over' at your place,enjoyed myself and for the songs that I traded.You've got good taste man.And to Steven,Gavin,Kimberly and Kathleen for taking their time off for this.

Spent today jamming.Eugene came over in the morning to register the PAE thing before we slacked for a while and he took my songs,you better return them sonny.Had lunch and headed for Simei's to play cover songs before spending the last few minutes with our originals.We came up with Malaysian version of Paramore,damn funny.Our plan was to actually go for the Ben & Jerry's Anchor Band competition which is a good challenge for us.But after talking to the guy in charge,we decided to scrap the idea because we feel that this isn't the path we want to go.The prizes are a bit tempting but we don't want to get tied down to doing things which we don't feel good making.So I guess it's the more 'indie' route of slowly gaining recognition by working our butts off slowly from the bottom to the top of the big shots.And we have confidence on our songs.It'll be war but we're willing to go the extra mile to fight it.





















The Early November's The Mother,The Mechanic And The Path.

My order finally came in and I had just enough cash to claim it today.I'm damn happy because it's selling at Hmv at 43 dollars and I got it for 2890.I'm so not going to Hmv to purchase cds again unless I'm very desperate and can't wait for a week.I haven't listened to it because I want to enjoy it fully when I can finally concentrate on all the songs fully.And it's a whole of 46 tracks in the whole album and it's concept revolves around a boy growing up to a bad father and promising to be a better one.Sadly,he became what he promised never to be.I think it's quite cool for bands to do such unique albums like Thrice for example,they're doing songs that revolves around the four elements Water,Fire,Earth and Wind spread out onto two albums.This album is a three piece as the album anme suggests.The Mechanic is the more upbeat,alternative sound that The Early November is known for.The Mother is the more mellow,softer side of The Early November and The Path is commentary,instrumental and a few proper songs that concludes off the trilogy.Sounds like the perfect formula for a masterpiece.


The adventure has begun...


I wanna have the same last dream again
The one where I wake up and I'm alive
Just as the four walls close me within
My eyes are opened up with pure sunlight
I'm the first to know
My dearest friends
Even if your hope has burned with time
Anything that's dead shall be re-grown
And your vicious pain, your warning sign
You will be fine

Hey oh, here I am
And here we go, life's waiting to begin

Any type of love it will be shown
Like every single tree reach for the sky
If you're gonna fall
I'll let you know
That I will pick you up
Like you for I
I felt this thing
I can't replace
Where everyone was working for this goal
Where all the children left without a trace
Only to come back, as pure as gold
To recite this all

Hey oh, here I am
And here we go, life's waiting to begin
Tonight
Hey oh, here I am
And here we go, life's waiting to begin
Tonight
Hey oh, here I am
And here we go, life's waiting to begin

I cannot live, I can't breathe
Unless you do this with me
I cannot live, I can't breathe
Unless you do this with me
I cannot live, I can't breathe
Unless you do this with me
I cannot live, I can't breathe
Unless you do this with me
I cannot live, I can't breathe
Unless you do this with me
I cannot live, I can't breathe
Unless you do this with me

Hey oh, here I am (do this with me)
And here we go, life's waiting to begin (do this with me)
Hey oh, here I am (do this with me)
And here we go, life's waiting to begin
Life's waiting to begin...


The Adventure by Angels & Airwaves.

Naïve Orleans...

Call it much ado about nothing.I'm glad we actually get to talk about it now.At least now I'm feeling better.And Sunday will just be a day of fun and perhaps something more,Aaron knows what I'm talking about.It's probably the day I'll get washed up and forget about the world.I can't wait to pool at his place.

I'm glad things worked out well in the end and I'm happy now.It was nothing more than a trip to Naïve Orleans...


Come and go now as you please
Your actions write the melodies
To the songs that we sing
And you just sing

And I finally found that life goes on without you
And my world still turns when you're not around

Is this the way you want it?
Is this the way it has to be?
Sitting here beside you
When my heart's lost in New Orleans
Dreams come clever
Hearts now severed
Difference of forever
And I am lost there

Well I finally found that life goes on without you
And my world still turns when you're not around
And I finally found that life goes on without you
And my world still turns when you're not around
And I finally find that all
Your actions write the melodies
To the songs that we sing
Your actions write the melodies
To the songs that we sing
And you just sing along out loud, yeah

Come and go now as you please
Your actions write the melodies
To the songs that we sing
And you just sing

Well I finally found that life goes on without you
And my world still turns when you're not around
And I finally found that life goes on without you
And my world still turns when you're not around
And I finally find that all
Your actions write the melodies
To the songs that we sing
Your actions write the melodies
To the songs that we sing
And you just sing along out loud...


Naïve Orleans by Anberlin.

I Hate This Song...

I really want you so badly.But I know I shouldn't.You belong to someone else.So I respect that.

Move on.Easier said that done.

Escaped from reality today.Just me,myself and I.I think I like it.I shall do it again soon.People never realised the joy of actually spending time alone.You get to dig deeper into yourself.It helps,I guess.A little discomfort at first but after you get used to it,it helps to heal.

Though I came out empty handed in the end,I think it's the best decision to be made.I've given it hard thoughts and I'm satisfied with how I dealt with it.It was the most fair decision for all.It prevents further blodshed in the end.It's for the good of everyone.


I hate this song because it was written for you...


Speak with your tongue tied
I know that you're tired
But I just want to know
Where you want to go
I may be sad but I'm not weak
This situation is bleak
And your puffy eyes never lie
Your tears come from inside

Until Sunday I'll be waiting for an answer
I guess that yesterday's not good enough for you
You know that I hate this song
You know that I hate this song
Because it was written for you

Drown your fears with me
I'm feeling real sorry
Your glossy eyes don't need
The sadness they have seen
But you're way too deep to swim
Back up again
But somehow I can't find
The moment you said goodbye

Until Sunday I'll be waiting for an answer
I guess that yesterday's not good enough for you
You know that I hate this song
You know that I hate this song
Because it was written for you

This is becoming a problem
I'm hurting, it's unfair
But somehow your words
The way that I heard are haunting me
You're under my skin
You're breaking in
And the tasteless fights
That filled our nights
Are starting to cave in
You're under my skin
You're breaking in
And if Sunday's what it takes to prove
I have nothing else to lose

Until Sunday I'll be waiting for an answer
I guess that yesterday's not good enough for you
You know that I hate this song
You know that I hate this song
Because it was written for you...


I Hate This Song by Secondhand Serenade.

Learning To Fall...

I'm having doubts writing this,yet I know there's no other place I can channel my emotions to.I actually spent hours just thinking if I should write whatever I'm writing now so I guess I made up my mind that I'm actually writing this down.

Funny isn't it how time just kills every inch of you and stabs you right in the back.One moment,I was feeling reborn and full of life.The next,I feel so lousy about everything and pathetic.I somehow had these signs that were so obvious given to me yet,I didn't realise it.The walk at the beach where I wrote in the sands actually came to life.Every single word from a song haunts me.The fact that the song became what it is was because of you.And then,it became a song that's more than just something that's written in my book.It became a song that I actually get to play it and share it with everyone I know of.That was probably the most coincidental hint that's given by God and yet,I didn't see it.I thought it was just a lucky day break where my story can just be heard.

It's cruel how things turned out.I kept emphasising how close I was back then and how everything fell apart from then.And I thought I would get another chance.I waited patiently until my troubles are gone and that my parents' worries and fears are gone.And when it did,I didn't even get that chance.It was taken away from me without me even realising it.It was right in front of me.Did I choose not to see it?Or was it a blind spot.I don't know.I don't think I want to know either.At least now I know one thing is for sure,I'm certainly not standing where I want to be right now.It's supposed to be this way,it's inevitable.Yet,I chose not to believe it.

Then again,I only have myself to blame.Everything was so perfect.It was.

Regrets.

If only I had done this differently.If only I had done certain things.Countless 'ifs'.And many more to come.I'm just so unsure of what to do now.I thought I had it planned and made to perfection.Guess everything has to come to a conclusion before the moment could actually happen.It's hard for me to take though I've been expecting it all along.It's ironic how things never ever go the way you planned it to be.I'm having doubts on everything now.I need a break from reality.I wish I could just spend the next few days off and just spend time with myself.Do whatever I want to clear my mind and think for myself.


There's always the other option.They always say,when one door closes,another one opens.This was what I thought to be the back-up plan of some sort.Yet now,I don't think it's fair for me to actually follow it.Yes,I know that it could be a little incentive but it wouldn't be fair to the other party isn't it?I've been using you for too long that I feel guilty enough for me to know that what I did wasn't right.I have nothing against you but it's just that,I don't think that I'm being fair to you.And I know I haven't been truly honest with you.I thought that I could at least tell this to you face to face but I'm not sure if I'm strong enough.You are an amazing person but I just don't think I am being fair to you and your feelings.I don't know if you're going to hate me or ignore me from now on and I don't blame you.It is my fault.


As for her,I feel the opposite.I just felt that I'm the one that's robbed of my chances although I know that I didn't take my chances when I had them then.I had my moments already and now,that moment belonged to someone else.Maybe this was how it's supposed to end.No fairytale endings.No happily ever after.Nothing.

For once,I hate double meanings.

All that matters to me now is that she's happy.I'm sure he will do much better than I ever could.And he'll treat you better than I ever wished I could do.At least now I know you're in good hands.And I don't want to be the cause of it falling apart.Things can only get better for her now.The reward I have now is to have a friend like her.To actually know those who's around her.These are great people that I never expected so much from.Yet they're doing everything they can to help in whatever way the can.Of course,I'm still learning from them.

It hurts.It hurts real bad.And I'm having a hard time writing this.I'm overwhelmed by emotions.Tears means nothing now.But it helps,I guess.It is the only way of releasing one's sadness and loss.Though it's only temporary.Half of me is wishing I didn't know the truth.Yet the other half is glad that I got to know about it now.

I hate this sinking feeling.Yet I keep coming back.I'm stubborn,but am I stubborn enough for this?Continuing the fight seems pointless now.Two's a company and three's a crowd so I'll leave it as it is.I'll fade away soon enough anyway,right?

Maybe my friends are right.But then again,they're not in my shoes.How would they know what I'm feeling.

Maybe everything was timed to perfection.It was just so coincidental that things are going too well and that the signs are showing up.It doesn't matter now anyway.Just take good care of her because she has given you that second chance.I'm sure she has given it some consideration and I'm sure she knows what's best for her.

I will be okay.At least now,I've said my piece though I still can't get thoughts of it out of my head and I probably wouldn't get my sleep.I know I will be okay so don't worry.

For anyone who's reading this or anyopone concerned,if I didn't reply any messages,calls,emails,conversations or whatever other means of communication please forgive me.I would prefer not to be disturbed for a while unless I am the one who initiated it.And there's only so few I can turn to to be my listening ear.

So yes,I'm leaving everything.I've made up my mind and it's the choice that I've to live with for the rest of my life.I may come to regret ot again someday but for now,I've made my stand.I feel that this is the most correct way of doing things.


I'm learning to fall...


Today is the day
The worst day of my life
You sulk until it hurts me
I don't know why
The cost of misery
Is at an all time high
I keep it hidden
Close to the surface inside

I'm learning to fall
I can't hardly breathe
When I'm going down don't worry about me
Don't try this at home
Pretend you don't see
I don't wanna know that you know
It should have been me

Could you be with him?
Or was it just a lie?
He doesn't catch you like I do
And you don't know why
You change your clothes and your hair
But I can't change your mind
Oh, I'm uninvited
So unrequited now

I'm learning to fall
I can't hardly breathe
When I'm going down don't worry about me
Don't try this at home
Pretend you don't see
I don't wanna know that you know
It should have been me

Words screaming in my head
Why did you leave?
And I can't stop dreaming
Watching you and him
When it should have been
It should have been me

Today is the day
The worst day of my life

I'm learning to fall
I can't hardly breathe
When I'm going down don't worry about me
Don't try this at home
Pretend you don't see
I don't wanna know that you know
It should have been me

Whoa
(I'm learning to fall, I can't hardly breathe
When I'm going down don't worry about me)
I don't want to know that you know, it should have been me
Whoa
(Don't try this at home, Pretend don't see)
I don't want to know that you know, it should have been me
Whoa
(I'm learning to fall, I can't hardly breathe
When I'm going down don't worry about me)
I don't want to know that you know, it should have been me
Whoa
(Don't try this at home, Pretend don't see)
I don't want to know that you know, it should have been me...


Learning To Fall by Boys Like Girls.

Rockstar...

Had to go to school today for the Provisional Admission Exercise and came home with a booklet and a letter adressed to me.It was that boring.Call it the slow start to the day but hell,the ending was terrific.Straight after we're finally allowed to go off,we headed to Simei for Ryan to pick up his guitar and equipments while we changed at his condo's changing room.Once we're comfortably in our 'uniform' we headed straight for *scape studio and we arrived there slightly less than 10 minutes early.We slacked a while and took some pictures before the moment comes.It was finally time to pick up our instruments and make music.Razi,the studio's 'owner' came shortly after that and so we started off with Into Oblivion.And then it was What You Want Is Not What You Need which Razi described as 'your band's hit song'.Now what could be more positive than that.This was actually a comment made by one of the judges for Baybeats and the guy working behind Wake Me Up Music.Next was Reunion which we made a few changes to,most obviously the intro.

Then we played Reunion and re-recorded Faded.It turned out pretty well I guess.JiaLin actually managed to make changes to the songs and it sounds much less 'cheena' now.And of course the vocals are much clearer now.Now I can finally feel safe about putting up Faded on MySpace.JiaLin has made Faded his own and I'm proud of his ability to improvise.We played the overplayed Wake Me Up When September Ends and tried our hands on Empty.I think we need to improvise a bit more on Empty if we want to try it again because the first part is too,empty(no pun intended).It probably lacked the feel because there isn't keyboards to accompany it.Followed by History which ended up pretty okay I guess.Other than the vocals which were understandably difficult to handle but I think we can modify it a bit to suit JiaLin's tone.And then we tried to play the new song 12 Used To Be My Lucky Number and I am proud to say that it's quite a success.I'm not sure how it is as far as the recording goes but JiaLin said he liked the song and that matters a lot to me because I don't want him to not like what he's singing since he's the frontman.

Alicia came at the last few minutes and helped to take more pictures of us playing this time.So we played around with What You Want Is Not What You Need and Reunion again before we left for Long John Silver's for a very late lunch and then to The Cathay's Ben & Jerry's for possibilities of having gigs there.The place is not too bad and Elliot said that we get free scoops after each songs which is damn worth it.Not sure how true it is though but I don't even mind getting paid in ice cream instead of cash since it's Ben & Jerry's anyway,so it's really good stuff.However,it's a bit of a challenge since we have to play a minimum of 2 sets which is about 7 to 8 songs per set so that makes it 14 songs.Hopefully we can somehow manage to come up with 14 cover songs and if possible some of our own compositions but I have a feeling Ben & Jerry's doesn't really like own composition songs so we'll see if we can at least play the song with the most positive feedback based on a poll.


Hey,hey I want to be a rockstar...


I'm through with standing in line
To clubs we'll never get in
It's like the bottom of the ninth
And I'm never gonna win
This life hasn't turned out
Quite the way I want it to be

(Tell me what you want)

I want a brand new house
On an episode of Cribs
And a bathroom I can play baseball in
And a king size tub big enough
For ten plus me

(So what you need?)

I'll need a credit card that's got no limit
And a big black jet with a bedroom in it
Gonna join the mile high club
At thirty-seven thousand feet

(Been there, done that)

I want a new tour bus full of old guitars
My own star on Hollywood Boulevard
Somewhere between Cher and
James Dean is fine for me

(So how you gonna do it?)

I'm gonna trade this life for fortune and fame
I'd even cut my hair and change my name

Cause we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses driving fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the drugs come cheap
We'll all stay skinny cause we just won't eat
And we'll hang out in the coolest bars
In the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger's
Gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny
With her bleach blond hair

Well,hey hey I wanna be a rockstar
Hey hey I wanna be a rockstar

I wanna be great like Elvis without the tassels
Hire eight body guards that love to beat up assholes
Sign a couple autographs
So I can eat my meals for free

(I'll have the quesadilla, uh huh)

I'm gonna dress my ass
With the latest fashion
Get a front door key to the Playboy mansion
Gonna date a centerfold that loves to
Blow my money for me

(So how you gonna do it?)

I'm gonna trade this life for fortune and fame
I'd even cut my hair and change my name

Cause we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses driving fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the drugs come cheap
We'll all stay skinny cause we just won't eat
And we'll hang out in the coolest bars
In the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger's
Gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny
With her bleach blond hair

And we'll hide out in the private rooms
With the latest dictionary and today's who's who
They'll get you anything with that evil smile
Everybody's got a drug dealer on speed dial

Well,hey hey I wanna be a rockstar

I'm gonna sing those songs
That offend the censors
Gonna pop my pills from a pez dispenser

I'll get washed-up singers writing all my songs
Lip sync em every night so I don't get them wrong

Cause we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses driving fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the drugs come cheap
We'll all stay skinny cause we just won't eat
And we'll hang out in the coolest bars
In the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger's
Gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny
With her bleach blond hair

And we'll hide out in the private rooms
With the latest dictionary and today's who's who
They'll get you anything with that evil smile
Everybody's got a drug dealer on speed dial

Well,hey hey I wanna be a rockstar
Hey hey I wanna be a rockstar...

I'm Like A Lawyer With The Way I'm Always Trying To Get You Off(Me & You)...

I'm so bored today that I actually took time off to re-watch music videos over and over and over again.I think FallOutBoy's new video is awesome.And I am totally into the song because of this video.It sort of get two messages across to the public.Firstly about the believable situation in Uganda.Secondly,the message of the song which was interpreted rather sweet and sadly.After taking a dig at critics for their previous video The Take Over,The Breaks Over,I think this shows a rather different side of FallOutBoy that's either having fun playing the song,making fun of themselves through the videos or making fun of the situation they're in.Apologies for the barely heard sound quality,it's the only one I could find.





I feel like a lawyer with the way I'm always trying to get you off...


Last year's wishes
Are this year's apologies
Every last time I come home
I take my last chance
To burn a bridge or two
I only keep myself this sick in the head
Cause I know how the words get you

We're the new face of failure
Prettier and younger but not any better off
Bullet proof loneliness
At best, at best

Me and you
Setting in a honeymoon
If I woke up next to you
If I woke up next to you
Me and you
Setting in a honeymoon
If I woke up next to you
If I woke up next to you

Collect the bad habits
That you couldn't bare to keep
Out of the woods but I love
A tree I used to lay beneath
Kissed teeth stained red
From a sour bottle baby girl
With eyes the size of baby worlds

We're the new face of failure
Prettier and younger but not any better off
Bullet proof loneliness
At best, at best

Me and you
Setting in a honeymoon
If I woke up next to you
If I woke up next to you
Me and you
Setting in a honeymoon
If I woke up next to you
If I woke up next to you

Me and you
Setting in a honeymoon
If I woke up next to you
If I woke up next to you
Me and you
Setting in a honeymoon
If I woke up next to you
If I woke up next to you

The best way
To make it through
With hearts and wrists intact
Is to realize
Two out of three ain't bad
Ain't bad

Me and you
Setting in a honeymoon
If I woke up next to you
If I woke up next to you
Me and you
(Honeymoon)
Setting in a honeymoon

Me and you
Setting in a honeymoon
If I woke up next to you
If I woke up next to you
Me and you
Setting in a honeymoon
If I woke up next to you
(Honeymoon)


I'm Like A Lawyer With The Way I'm Always Trying To Get You Off(Me & You) by Fall Out Boy.

Begin Again From The Beginning...

Sometimes you just don't know what you're doing and so unsure of what lies ahead.Yet we choose to ignore the warnings and still go for it.There's plenty to lose and yet,nothing much to gain.Like now,I've finally decided that I'll follow my heart and not my head.It is difficult to live with it for possibly the rest of your life but then again,you'll have to pick yourself up if it fails.I say the most challenging thing is to actually tell someone how much you actually think this through and how difficult a decision that you make.Not only that,others who feel that you should actually follow your head will cause even more uncertainty.I've been through that trust me.And now,I'm doing something that's against everyone's wishes in a way because I do know that this is the right one for me.Even if I were to make the wrong choice,I'll just have to move on.

Already right now,I'm feeling guilty.I never wanted things to turn out this way,guess it's mistakes on my part.But then again,who would've thought it could turn out this well.It's just a terrible situation that I'm stuck in and I'm forced to make up my mind.I have to be sure so there wouldn't be any regrets.God please help me find the strength to get through this.And the chance to actually speak the words that I really want to because I don't want to blow my last chance just like that.Hopefully,things work out the way I want it to be from now on and things will be alright.This is the moment whereby I have to begin again from the beginning...


I travelled to each road
And the end of the earth
With nowhere else to go
I looked back in amazement
When I finally realized
How far that I had actually gone
I was still standing
In the same place that I started
Til I found out and I cried out
There was silence
A deafening silence
More brilliant than anything

And there was a bird
With feathers brightest red as blood
At least that what you saw
I saw an angel
On the whitest November's morning
And I heard her sing the sweetest cry
Since she wanted to reach down
And tell me it would me alright
And I knew it would be alright

I walked on
And stared into the golden sun
I was blinded
But enamored by it's beauty
Til I found out and I cried out
There was silence
A deafening silence
More brilliant than anything

And there was a bird
With feathers brightest red as blood
At least that what you saw
I saw an angel
On the whitest November's morning
And I heard her sing the sweetest cry
Since she wanted to reach down
And tell me it would me alright
And I knew it would be alright

Foreign train tracks serenade you
But their sound is never permanent
These landscapes ever changing
Like arrival times on railway bluebirds
You close your eyes and then you're gone

And there was a bird
With feathers brightest red as blood
At least that's what you saw
I saw an angel
On the whitest November's morning
And I heard her sing the sweetest cry
Since she wanted to reach down
And tell me it would be alright
And I knew it would be alright...


Begin Again From The Beginning by The Ataris.

Lyrical Lies...

I went for the LimeSonicBangPreview two days ago just to catch WestGrandBoulevard play a couple of songs and boy was it worth it.Especially because they played Flights Of Fancy just like Dharma promised to and I've finally listened to three of their new songs Earning The Life,Trees and DKNY.They sounded rocking good and I really can't wait to get my hands on their new album which is due to hit the stores.Got Monofone's self-titled EP and WGB's pins.
















Dharma and I.
















Me,Ryan,Dharma,Jude,Bryan,Syed and Erik.












































WestGrandBoulevard on stage.


Bad news,the computer is facing a serious shortage in free spaces.I have two computers so I'll have to rip all my songs in my other computer which means,I won't be able to put them into my iPod.Until I come up with a something to solve this problem,I'll just have to make use of whatever songs I have in this computer as titles for my blog posts.

Tomorrow will be another jamming day at a new studio so I'm hoping it's going to be a much better place with a fresher atmosphere.We're going to re-record our songs What You Want Is Not What You Need and Reunion.Not forgetting our long lost song Faded and a new song which I wrote a few weeks back called 12 Used To Be My Lucky Number.It's going to be a different side of the band since it's my kind of music and more mellow and softer than any of our previous works.Hopefully it'll come out alright and the response of it will be positive.

Thanks alot Jingyi for the cookies.I'm not going to eat it because it looks so good.


Well,I wrote the words in ink and there's no way it's going to ever be erased.It's not just lyrical lies,I meant it...


An old man gave me a tip he said
"Don't waste your time with politics" he said
"Just chase skirts instead"
"Life is too short, and you're almost dead" he said
"I met a woman once, I gave her my best shot"
"But never did I talk and talk and talk"
"If I had her back, I'd be as real as my age"
"I so don't blame them, I wouldn't do the same"
"But I can blame them, I'd sing her this"

And you want to be dressed in poetry
But imagery doesn't fit
And you want resizing
But darling dear get a grip

And I think what I just wrote is going over my head
I'm stealing lines from myself
And what I said was never said

It's just a lyrical lie
Made up in my mind

And you want to be dressed in poetry
But imagery doesn't fit
And you want resizing
But darling dear get a grip

You're moving but not aware
You're drowsy without a care
Except keeping your whites behind your lids
And your lids are your best canvas
I can only imagine what you're painting, what you're painting
And your body on my mattress is proof
And your makeup on my pillow is proof
But do you think I am telling you the truth

It's just a lyrical lie
Made up in my mind

And you want to be dressed in poetry
But imagery doesn't fit
And you want resizing
But darling dear get a grip

And you want to be dressed in poetry
But imagery doesn't fit
And you want resizing
But darling dear get a grip...


Lyrical Lies by Cute Is What We Aim For.

Break Out!Break Out!

Today was another fun day.Spent the whole day out and it was enjoyable.Met Eugene first thing in the morning to get my We The Kings and then to Bugis with Ryan and JiaLin.We went over to Sim lim to see if they've got audio recorders for us to record our songs the next time around since the sound quality of our songs aren't very good.Sadly,they don't have any that is specialised for recording music and not just voices speaking so I'm guessing the sound is going to be just as muffled as before.Next we're off to town and first up Hmv Where I got Duncan James's Future Past for my mom.I can't believe the price tag so I actually went and asked the guy again just to confirm and yes,the price is $4.95.My jaw nearly dropped but I am not complaining one bit.So I gave myself a pat in the back knowing that my mom is going to be so happy and hopefully I can use it as bait to get whatever I want next,evil me.

Spent the rest of the time in FarEast at 2001 for Ryan's and JiaLin's shirts.While I finally got my white skinnies.Next we're cd hunting at Inokii.And I was on such a roll today that my order for All Time low came in.I was over the moon.And that's when I took another note from my wallet to place my next order which is the Early November's The Mother,The Mechanic And The Path.Though my wallet cried out in pain,I was really desperate to get myself more cds.Then we slacked at Wisma Atria's Starbucks Coffee and that's when I saw Helmi and Hairil.I was stunned to see the way they dress,I guess that's how everyone feels after they're so used to seeing everyone else in uniform.
















All Time Low's So Wrong,It's Right.

All the way from the United States,All Time Low didn't disappoint me one bit.It's made me feel an all time high actually.They've got a fresh sound that's alternative/punk but without all the noisy nonsense like most punk bands.It's those slightly softer and less attitude about teenage angst whatsoever.It's much like Cartel with a touch of The Summer Obsession without the synthesizers.And that equates to an awesome combination that suits my taste in music very well.They're currently on Tourzilla with the likes of Boys Like Girls,The Audition and We The Kings so if you like any of these bands then it's time to check out All Time Low.Sadly though,Hmv don't seem to have it so order it or if you have a cd that I might be interested in then I won't mind swapping.





















Starbucks Coffee,I love the Green Tea Frappucino.


Tomorrow's plans will be another outing to Ryan's place to do the new songs and redo parts of Faded.And then off to Orchard again,to catch the pre-LimeSonicBang at cineleisure.I managed to pester Dharma to play Flights Of Fancy so hopefully,he'll keep his promise.I'm going there mainly to catch West Grand Boulevard and it's officially my first ever gig because I've missed out so much thanks to the O's.Now,it's payback time baby!Tomorrow is going to be a blast!Let's break out!Break out!


Luck loves me not tonight I'm running out
This four leaf clover's all but useless now
I've got four wheels that say I'm not alone tonight
I'm always looking for a joy ride through the brightest part of this town

Break out, break out
As we escape through the windows
Head for the car
And never look back
Singing singing
"Break out, break out
Our time has come and
We've got these big city dreams."

Put up or shut up we're not wasting time again
The credits are rolling and we're getting lost again
In parking lots to serenading sirens
As the blue lights bathed our smiles

Break out, break out
As we escape through the windows
Head for the car
And never look back
Singing singing
"Break out, break out
Our time has come and
We've got these big city dreams."

Lets take a moment to reflect
On the past few years of my life
I haven't worked myself away
To stay inside
This is the time to let us

Break out, break out
As we escape through the windows
Head for the car
And never look back
Singing singing
"Break out, break out
Our time has come and
We've got these big city dreams."


Break Out!Break Out! by All Time Low.

Heels Over Head...

Woke up at 10 feeling slightly dead and slept again,bad mistake.I woke up again at 1130,just enough time to rush to meet Eugene at my house bus stop at 1215.I just grabbed whatever shirt I could find and got all dressed up by 1145.Had my brunch and ran to the bus stop.Luckily,I had enough time to relax first before his bus came and we waited for bus 10 to come.The trip there to Simei was faster than expected and we were punctual.Got into the room and played What You Want Is Not What You Need since Jia Lin has learned how to sing it and we had a new drumbeat for it too.It sounds more dancey and catchier somehow and I had a new bassline for the bridge.It was great considering it's our first time with Jia Lin singing and he improvised the chorus too which was good.So I guess he's more than an able replacement for Lovell.No offence to him,he was a good friend and I admire his courage and daredevil-ness just that he seems to be busy now being a full-time boyfriend.Maybe that's why I'm always having second thoughts on getting attached unless of course my girlfriend actually supports it.Now that's another thign altogether.

Anyway,we tried our new song Reunion after that.Spend almost a whole hour teaching Eugene the drumming and Jia Lin the singing.Not only was it our first time playing the song,the structure of the song isn't the normal 'verse,chorus,verse,choruse,bridge,last chorus'.It's a totally new thing I kind it quite unique because there's so much energy and intensity yet,we managed to mix it with slow and progressive rhythms.It's totally new thing for me since whatever lyrics I write are just one pace major/power chords mainly because I've no absolute idea how to make really good guitar licks.I guess that's Ryan's element and I look forward to the next time we come up with yet another song.I learned how to do a swing with my guitar from Ryan and I tried jumping once and I so as hell want to master jumping with a guitar by the end of the year.It's way cool.I'm waiting for him to show up so I can get the recordings and listen to it.For samples of it catch it here http://www.myspace.com/savingsomeonemusic but it's not of the highest quality just yet so please bear with it.Lastly,we tried to cover Into Oblivion by Funeral For A Friend but we didn't have enough time to work on it.

Once we're done,Eugene and I dashed out to flag a cab to drop me at Tanah Merah before going to the Great World City area where Eugene's cousin stays.I met Elliot and Aaron since they're there early and was soon joined by Charmaine.Kimberly came shortly after with her to classmates Elisabeth and Erny(apologies if I spelt any of your names incorrectly,I only know you guys today so pardon me).The first thing we did there was to play bowling and I swear,it's my first ever time and I enjoyed it.Mainly because I won and because I got a spare and a strike.I was damn proud if myself,like some great lifetime achievement.With a score of 82 for my first try,I think I didn't do so bad.Played at the arcade and headed for a walk by the beach.We started writing in the sands and all that.Played at the playground while waiting for the food to be cooked and it was worth the wait.Satays,sausages,otahs and chicken wings,yummy.Sat arounda nd just talked and I find it so comfortable speaking to these people whom I didn't have much chance to in catechism class.Maybe I could spend more time nowadays just hanging out with these cool bunch of people.To say it's fun is an understatement.

Headed back early with Elliot while the other three played bowling which I heard Aaron owned big time.We talked at the cab ride to Tanah Merah Mrt about our bands and his previous gigs.I promised to catch his next one during the holidays and who knows,I might get one too although I really want to have a few to keep me occupied before the holidays becomes same old boring holidays.Besides,now my mom has allowed me more time to spend with my friends which can only be a good thing.I'll take my words back about parents being unfair and all,I guess my mom isn't the kind who goes back on her words.I'm glad she's accepting my different way of lifestyle compared to my brother.I value my friends very high up my list of priorities and I enjoy the company of my friends.Let's just end it off by saying that I'm glad that this is just the beginning of my holiday because I need the long well-deserved break after battling hard for the whole year.


The scene today reminded me of that day.When everything fell apart piece by piece.And for that,I hate the sands and the sea.It felt like only yesterday that I was heels over head...


I got your runaway smile in my piggybank baby
Gonna cash it right in for a new Mercedes
You were worth a hundred thousand miles
But you couldn't stay a while
I got your little brown shirt in my bottom drawer baby
And your little white socks in my top drawer
You were always leaving your shit around
And gone without a sound

Yeah,I'm the first to fall
And the last to know
Where'd you go?

Now I'm heels over head
I'm hanging upside down
Thinking how you left me for dead
California bound

I got a first class ticket to a night all alone
And a front row seat up right by the phone
Cause you're always on my mind
And I'm running out of time
I've got your hair on my pillow and your smell in my sheets
And it makes me think about you with the sand in your feet
Is it all you thought it'd be?
You mean everything to me

But I'm the first to fall
And the last to know
Where'd you go?

Now I'm heels over head
I'm hanging upside down
Thinking how you left me for dead
California bound
And when you hit the coast
I hope you think of me
And how I'm stuck here with the ghost
Of what we used to be

You're burning bridges baby
Burning bridges, making wishes
Yeah you're burning bridges baby
Burning bridges, making wishes
You're burning bridges baby
Burning bridges, making wishes
Yeah you're burning bridges baby
Burning bridges, making wishes

You're a chance taker, heartbreaker
Got me wrapped around your finger
Chance taker, heartbreaker
Got me wrapped around your finger

I got your runaway smile in my piggybank baby
Gonna cash it right in for a new Mercedes
If I drive a hundred thousand miles
Would you let me stay a while?

Now I'm heels over head
I'm hanging upside-down
Thinking how you left me for dead
California bound
And when you hit the coast
I hope you think of me
And how I'm stuck here with the ghost
Of what we used to be

Now I'm heels over head
I'm hanging upside-down
Thinking how you left me for dead
California bound
And when you hit the coast
Maybe you'll finally see
And then you'll turn it all around
And you'll come back to me...


Heels Over Head by Boys Like Girls.

Cat And Mouse...

We The Kings' We The Kings.

One word,wow.Anyone listening to my type of music will be caught dead without getting this album.It's almost sinful to not get it considering it's only a miserable $17 in Hmv.Probably the most worth it buy from Hmv ever.If you liked the song that's playing in my blog currently then you're going to enjoy the rest of the album because Skyway Avenue just summarised everything about this band.Catchy melodies that hooks you for hours and easy to catch on lyrics that'll get you mouthing to it everytime you listen to it.The closest sibling to this kind of music is probably Boys Like Girls and All Time Low so if you're a fan of either,you very well know what to get before the year ends.


Today marks the end of everything I've lived for,for the past 4 years.Yes,I've closed the door on O levels and I'm off on my way to slightly less than 2 months of freedom.There's just too many things to do and yet there's so little time.Anyway,I wanted to play soccer right after the papers today because it's perhaps the most therapiutic way of expressing my anger,frustration,joy,sorrow and all other kinds of feelings and getting rewarded with a goal.That's what makes it so fun.I was so up for it that I een brought two extra shirts in case I stink the bus or whatever.Turns out,the weather killed everything and everyone wanted the playtime until 1 which I didn't want to of course.I've got other business to attend to so I left.

Met Ryan at Simei and had brunch at Long John's.Then his friend Francesca joined us before she left again.We went to his crib after that to work on our new project,Saving Someone.Don't ask me how Eugene and I come up with that name but yes,it's official.I tried to chip in ideas for the new song he was writing and yes,the guitar licks impressed me.It was totally a brand new sound from our previous two songs and I'm glad I played a part in creating it.It's got an edgier sound and lyrically,it's a challenge for me because I don't really expose myself to writing such types of music.I'm more of the clean cut Ryan Cabrera kind that touches on puppy romance and all that.Though I do write other stuff too,it's just not as complex as this.For that,I give myself a pat in the back.We even became so desperate that we have to use Scrabble for inspirations and it sure did help.

Plans for tomorrow:jam jam jam and hopefully,attend Kim's barbecue at Safra.I really want to catch up with people that I've not really have the spent plenty of time with and I think it's only fair I show up even if it's for a few minutes.I'm going to have a such a hard time convincing my mom to let me go.So much for me saying that my mom has cooled things down since she said every single time that I can do whatever I want after my O's and here's the contradiction.Parents,they give us false hopes and dash it away the moment it's supposed to be fulfilled.And when we break our promise,they go hard on us.Where has the fairness gone people?So much for calling it 'freedom at last' when I'm still tied to my leash.


Well now that everything has settled,it's time to make one of the biggest decision of my life.I'm afraid however that this decision isn't one which I'm going to make.The decision is not in my hands and I have no choice but to face whatever that comes from it with arms wide open.It's going to hurt but hopefully,for the better and I'm fearful.I don't want to be forced to make a painful decision when I obviously know I won't be able to handle it.Am I supposed to be happy when all I ever wanted,come with a price?So much for calling it a simple game cat and mouse...


Softly we tremble tonight
Picture perfect fading smiles are all that's left in sight
I said I'd never leave you'll never change
I'm not satisfied with where I'm at in life

Am I supposed to be happy?
With all I ever wanted, it comes with a price
Am I supposed to be happy?
With all I ever wanted, it comes with a price
You said, you said that you would die for me

We made plans to grow old
Believe me there was truth in all those stories that I told
Lost in a simple game cat and mouse
Are we the same people as before this came to light?

Am I supposed to be happy?
With all I ever wanted, it comes with a price
Am I supposed to be happy?
With all I ever wanted, it comes with a price
You said, you said that you would die for me

You must live for me too
For me too
Yeah, yeah,yeah,yeah
Yeah,you said that you would die for me

Am I supposed to be happy?
With all I ever wanted, it comes with a price
Am I supposed to be happy?
With all I ever wanted, it comes with a price
You said, you said that you would die for me
You said that you would die for me
You said that you would die for me
You said that you would die for me,oh...


Cat And Mouse by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus.