I Won't See You Tonight Part 1...

Is this it?The end of everything I've hoped for?Could it be?Whatever happened during the past days has been nothing much but a blur to me.For once in a veyr long while,I'm having doubts all over again.It's like some kind of disease.And to make things worse,I probably screwed up everything that day.Words came out of my mouth without me thinking.At times I kept quiet,I was scared.Scared of saying the wrong words.Saying things that I shouldn't.And that wasn't helping the situation either.

I kind of expected this to come any moment.And true enough it did,though I tried to brush it off my thoughts.It really wasn't much of a surprise since it happens too many times before but nothing beats the real thing.That was serious business.It was intense moments though it started out really shakily and awkward.Everything peaked up from there and thinking about what the words that were exchanged,I don't really know why I wasn't in tears that day.It's still quite a mystery to me since I'm such a sucker for sensitivity.

Something tells me that what you said was just a disguise to what you really want to say.Our body language was totally different from the way we said we would.Not that I would complain about it of course.I was happy enough spending the moment with you,nothing else would have mattered.Come to think it,it's actually the first in my life that I had been in this position before.Never before have I been so close yet so far.The last time something quite similar happened was right before everything started.And I hate to be suffering the same fate but who am I to decide anyway and I know it's hard to have to decide since everything seems to be happening at the same time.It's tough on you.And up until now,I still don't know the reason why people prefer neither than either.

I don't know what I'll do if I were in those shoes either,since I don't want to sound biased.And I don't want to be selfish.When I told my friend this,the response was "love's selfish" and quite rightly so.But when you told me to use the time to reflect about everything that has happened,the only answer I got right now is don't give up the fight just yet.And I'm determined to stick by it.Though we know it shouldn't happen,it doesn't mean it couldn't happen.It's up to us to decide to take the path and walk through it together.I hope our feelings are reciprocal since what I think is that our body language is telling us that it is the case.I won't get to see you tonight...


Cry alone
I've gone away
No more nights
No more pain
I've gone alone
Took all my strength
I've made the change
I won't see you tonight

Sorrow
Sank deep inside my blood
All the ones around me
I cared for and loved

Building up inside of me
A place so dark, so cold
I had to set me free
Don't mourn for me
You're not the one to place the blame
As bottles called my name
I won't see you tonight

Sorrow sank deep inside my blood
All the ones around me
I cared for and most of all I loved
But I can't see myself that way
Please don't forget me or cry while I'm away

Cry alone
I've gone away
No more nights
No more pain
I've gone alone
Took all my strength
But I've made the change
I won't see you tonight

So far away
I'm gone
Please don't follow me tonight
And while I'm gone everything will be alright

No more breath inside
Essence left my heart tonight
No more breath inside
Essence left my heart tonight...


I Won't See You Tonight Part1 by Avenged Sevenfold.

Heaven For The Weather,Hell For The Company...

Ok,so the past few days has been hell in the cell.Seriously.This could very well be the last few post of the month,term and until o level,whichever way you prefer to view it as.As far as possible,I will try to update it once a month at the very least whenever I could since I will use whatever time I have to quickly get the computer up and running while my mom is out.Well,that's what I plan to do from now on.I'm as good as being banned to do anything other than going home early from school,open a book,sit down and study.She figured that's the only way and not forgetting the continuous nagging whenever she sees me.And it has been happening since the past two days.It all started after she collected my report book in school yesterday and had a mini teacher-parent conference.

It was after my mother tongue o level papers and all I wanted to do after the paper was to go home and sleep.Sleep I did,until she comes home with those face,decided to wake me up after three days of studying non-stop and started 'singing'.It's as good as any screamo band,honestly speaking.And I couldn't touch the bed since then.All I did was sit at the study table with the room all to myself since I locked the room,with the key inside of course.Of course I was pissed,who wouldn't?It's like I wasted my breath on telling her what went wrong during the mid-year papers and instead,I got the hairdryer treatment ala Sir Alex Ferguson.Ugh,the pain I had to endure.And then evrything starts faling apart.My schedule for the week disappeared in less than a second adter planning it for days.

I can't leave my hone unless it's school and unless there's proper lesson so I won't get to leave for school for self-study like the vice-principal asked everyone to.Top off the no going out with friends or whatever which of course has taken effect since the day I was born.Worse still,since I'm confirmed already and I don't have anymore classes,there goes my weekend of breathing fresh air too.Hey I can take all these.But the final straw was the fact I've to be home early and she's patrolling me.Already she's controlling my life,more or less,now she has full access to it.But it looks like I don't even have a life now.No more fun,joy and laughter.

Which also brings me to the part where I won't get to see Kathleen again before she's off to Europe.We planned to meet tomorrow but the plan has to be scrapped along with every other plans I have.I'm really sorry yeah Kathleen,I'll make up for it.I promise.Hopefully as soon as the screw in my mom's head is fixed since it's been a little loose and on overload mode.I wanted to see you so badly and yeah,now I have so called home probation and I won't get in touch with the world anymore.Remember to get me some souvenirs yeah?Nah,just kidding.The best souvenir will be your touchdown after mummy-fying myself with hell notes.I'll be revived when you're back.

Anyway,mother tongue was I don't know.I can either screw up everything or I'll do well in it.I took a big gamble which might pay off hopefully.I have never really put in a 'peribahasa' or in English terms some proverbs in my composition until yesterday's paper.In fact I inserted two.I chose the topic on 'Someone who gave you a piece of advice at the moment you really needed it.' I had no other choice but to lie a little bit here and there.The other two composition options was far too difficult for me to even branch out ideas.Anyway,what's done is done anyway.And we got our class tee after so long.Not bad at all.Polo tee with a decent design and yeah,just simplicity at it's best.I don't really care about some small details that some people are too concerned with,since there's bound to be a disagreement with each design.You can't please everyone.

Same goes for me,I can't please everyone.I'm human too.There's bound to me mistakes that I make and I can't ask for a second take.That's life,I got to live with it.That reminds me,"Even the best falls down sometimes.Even the wrong words seem to rhyme."Enough said.This is going to be a test that's going to be hard to overcome but I'll keep trying.And so far,there's only one reason why I keep trying to prove everyone wrong.The only reason that keeps me strong,keeps me going and just calms me whenever I'm fuming mad.Thanks dear,it's evident now how much you changed me and made a difference in the way I lead my life.A million 'thank you's are not enough.Keep believing in yourself.

By the way the advice I wrote in my composition was "If you give up,you're not giving up on others.But you're on giving up on yourself." tranlsted in Malay language which sounds really weird so I'm not sure if the marker will get the meaning of it right.It's heaven for the weather,hell for the company.


I haven't lost the way I feel
Didn't look away this time
The blood that's filling up these veins
Doesn't half as feel like mine

The shadows never seemed to comfort me (I don't want to feel this way)
How many little lies will make us say (I don't want to feel this way)

Hide the truth from my eyes
I will never know
I will never know
And tear the sun from my sky
Cause I will never know
I will never know

I didn't want to cross the line
I didn't want this on my mind
But through all the things I've said
I'm still a part of this machine

The shadows never seemed to comfort me (I don't want to feel this way)
How many little lies will make us say (I don't want to feel this way)

Hide the truth from my eyes
I will never know
I will never know
And tear the sun from my sky
Cause I will never know
I will never know

Hide the truth from my eyes
I will never know
I will never know
And tear the sun from my sky
Cause I will never know
I will never ever ever ever know

Hide the truth from my eyes
Oh, Oh
I will never never know
I will never never know
I will never know
I will never never know...


Heaven For The Weather,Hell For The Company by LostProphets.

Read My Mind...

Today is such a dark day.I know I shouldn't get myself distracted with all this especially when my future might be affected tomorrow.But somehow,I can't seem to ignore it.Spent the day doing my work and thinking of you at every other moment.Every message I received,the only person's name I hope to see is yours.But I don't know what's going through your mind at the moment.And I'm gutted that I don't have the secret formula to making you feel better because me just simply being there certainly isn't good enough.It's like as though you're all alone in the world and you've got no clue on the whereabouts of everyone.

I hate the feeling of being in the lurch.And I'm being moodless to everything that's happening around me.It's like as if I've lost a part of myself in the process.I even had funny ideas of what I should do and mind you,it wasn't funny.The thought of it is painful enough and already,it hurts me to see you hurt.Or at least,you being bothered by the events of things that happened.It happened a lot to me,but what I learn is no matter how sucky your day is or how emo you are on that day,you should never let that affect your relationship with those who cares for you.Never let your emotions control you,you should control your emotions.I know it's always easier said than done but that's all I can give now.

If only I can read your mind,it would have been easier.Because I won't shine if you don't shine,just say 'read my mind'...


On the corner of main street
Just tryin' to keep it in line
You say you wanna move on and
You say I'm falling behind

Can you read my mind?
Can you read my mind?

I never really gave up on
Breakin' out of this two-star town
I got the green light
I got a little fight
I'm gonna turn this thing around

Can you read my mind?
Can you read my mind?

The good old days, the honest man
The restless heart, the Promised Land
A subtle kiss that no one sees
A broken wrist and a big trapeze

Oh well I don't mind, you don't mind
Cause I don't shine if you don't shine
Before you go, can you read my mind?

It’s funny how you just break down
Waitin' on some sign
I pull up to the front of your driveway
With magic soakin' my spine

Can you read my mind?
Can you read my mind?

The teenage queen, the loaded gun
The drop dead dream, the Chosen One
A southern drawl, a world unseen
A city wall and a trampoline

Oh well I don't mind, you don't mind
Cause I don't shine if you don't shine
Before you go
Tell me what you find when you read my mind

Slippin’ in my faith until I fall
You never returned that call
Woman, open the door, don't let it sting
I wanna breathe that fire again

She said
Oh well I don't mind, you don't mind
Cause I don't shine if you don't shine

Put your back on me
Put your back on me
Put your back on me

The stars are blazing like rebel diamonds cut out of the sun
When you read my mind...


Read My Mind by The Killers.

Only Hope...

Today is the dreaded thursday.And guess what,it totally lived up to it's name.Let's start the day with a briefing for O level Mother Tongue paper which will take place 4 days from now.Then we had our daily two periods of mother tongue periods in which we had yet another paper which I have no time to finish,for obvious reasons.And then it was Poa,yay,possibly the 'most exciting,entertaining with one of the world's fastest teacher who has a good sense of humour'.And she didn't even bring my mid year paper for me to check at least since I just happened to be absent for the two days she has lessons with our class.She said "I brought the papers faithfully with me everyday but not today.I think I must have sent it for cremation".Before she finished her sentence I walked away and yeah,that's how much respect I have for her since today.

And the last two periods of today,we had Poa again and guess what,I still didn't get my papers.It's not like as if I absent myself from her lessons on purpose right?And to think I'm the younger one between us when you're the one thinking so childishly,if there's even such a word.At least Mrs Yeow is being in such a good mood off late and that certainly made me want to learn something.Then we had Mother Tongue again,luckily social studies is cancelled today.The world must have had enough poking fun at me.So guess what productive things did I do today?I doodle in my handbook and draw on my hand.Most of it during Poa period of course.And I studied at home.Yes you're reading this right.I did study when I get back home.




















In case of emergency,cut along the dotted line.I swear it nearly went emergency during the last period of the day.

Well,if there's one thing that I want now is to catch Anberlin's concert on June 3.But I doubt I can.Firstly I don't know how to convince my parents to allow me to.Unless some kind soul can afford me one or if it ever drop from the sky.I've only been listening to Anberlin for less than 6 months but I'm already quite a fan of them.Their songs are really deep in meanings and I like that.And really really catchy.One of the most non-rip-off band I've ever known.Wonder why they aren't that big.

Second is to see Kathleen again before you're jetting to Europe for holiday.I wish I could fit in your baggage.I want to tour Europe too.Anyway,that will be 14 days more or less.And I got to really think of what to do for the two weeks because I really don't know.Unlike the last time you went,I don't think you need me to tell you what I did to kill time then.I really hope you have a blast during the trip next week,spending quality time with your family.Don't worry about me,I will survive through it.For one simple reason.


Pete told me the previous post was filled with hope.I believe in hope.Or rather,I have learned to hope.I have discovered myself all over again.Or discovering a new side of me I've never really known of.I guess all the negative thoughts in my mind has changed,slightly at least.But it sure made a hell lot of difference to my mindset towards things.And I know now you're my only hope...


There's a song that's inside of my soul
It's the one that I've tried to write over and over again
I'm awake in the infinite cold
But you sing to me over and over again

So I lay my head back down
And I lift my hands
And pray to be only yours
I pray to be only yours
I know now you're my only hope

Sing to me the song of the stars
Of your galaxy dancing and laughing
And laughing again
When it feels like my dreams are so far
Sing to me of the plans that you have for me over again

And I lay my head back down
And I lift my hands and pray
To be only yours
I pray to be only yours
I know now you're my only hope

I give you my apathy
I'm giving you all of me
I want your symphony
Singing in all that I am
At the top of my lungs
I'm giving it back

And I lay my head back down
And I lift my hands and pray
To be only yours
I pray to be only yours
I pray to be only yours
I know now you're my only hope...


Only Hope by Switchfoot.

Kryptonite...

Okay so my mom will be back to her post as the boss of the house by the next few hours.Which obviously means that I won't be able to use the computer as often as how I used for the past three weeks.And that probably mean that one way of communication with my people will be shortened,sadly.Anyway I got hold of Maroon 5's It Won't Be Soon Before Long after pre-ordering it yesterday.















It Won't Be Soon Before Long,whatever that means.















Maroon 5 cd plus yet another shirt,yay-ness.















Then I pampered myself with Fish & Co. for dinner.I love the cola tonic.


So yeah,headed home after that,did the last laundry of the long three weeks.Not forgetting the last ironing.I made myself proud today by being such a good boy doing the housework and surviving the past three months enduring all the outside food which has gone out of taste now since I enjoy homecooked food more and I miss my mom's cooking.No doubt about it.No matter how simple the dish is,nothing beats homecooked food.Anyway,just found this in my computer and thought I should post it up for some reason.
















Good Charlotte.I want to get a shirt from Made,the Madden twins' clothes label.















And again,I love Joel's top.And the brass knuckles chain on Benji.Plus Paul's fringe and Billy Martin's cool-ness.




















And my moment of pride.Courtesy of Sophia's sister,Samantha.Either the guy there is sleeping while I'm speaking or he's taking nap.Both ways,I lose.


Never aim for perfection.Noone can reach the stage of perfection.Whoever believes in 'practice makes perfect is a liar'.It's called strength and weakness.Everyone has a strength.Everyone has a weakness.It's a matter of how you see your weaknesses and your strengths as.In fact,I'm glad that I have a weakness since my weakness is also my strength.You're my strength,you're my weakness.Thanks to you I'm Superman now,but you're still my Kryptonite...


I took a walk around the world
To ease my troubled mind
I left my body laying somewhere
In the sands of time
But I watched the world float
To the dark side of the moon

I feel there is nothing I can do, yeah

I watched the world float
To the dark side of the moon
After all I knew it had to be
Something to do with you
I really don’t mind what happens now and then
As long as you’ll be my friend at the end

If I go crazy then will you still
Call me Superman
If I’m alive and well, will you be
There a-holding my hand
I’ll keep you by my side
With my superhuman might
Kryptonite

You called me strong, you called me weak
But still your secrets I will keep
You took for granted all the times
I never let you down
You stumbled in and bumped your head
If not for me then you'd be dead
I picked you up and put you back
On solid ground

If I go crazy then will you still
Call me Superman
If I’m alive and well
Will you be there a-holding my hand
I’ll keep you by my side
With my superhuman might
Kryptonite

If I go crazy then will you still
Call me Superman
If I’m alive and well
Will you be there
Holding my hand
I’ll keep you by my side
With my superhuman might
Kryptonite
Yeah

If I go crazy then will you still
Call me Superman
If I'm alive and well
Will you be there a-holding my hand
I'll keep you by my side
With my superhuman might
Kryptonite...


Kryptonite by 3 Doors Down.

Inevitable...

It all happened yesterday.Everything.And though I've been happier off late,another concern grows within.If ever there was something that is different this time,it has got to be the support by the most unlikeliest of sources.This person told me "You've been looking far and wide just looking.And now that there's one that right in front of you who is everything you need,you decide to let go." "I'm not letting go,"I argued back.
"This is your one and only chance,take it."He said."Don't let this chance pass you by,one shot."
"I have faith in her."
"Look,I've had seen people saying this and in the end look where they are now?"
"She isn't that type.Trust me will you,like how I trust her."
"I don't want you to end up like me."
"I know,I know."
"Instead of putting everything to halt because of it,why don't you fight it together.It's better if you're atttacking on both fronts."
"I don't know man.And since we agreed to it just now,I don't think I can take back those words.Besides,I don't know how to tell her all these."
"The ball is back in your feet,it's up to you how you control it.But don't come running back to me because I did pass you the ball."
"Sigh..."
"It looks like you've grown.I don't think you need me to tell you what to do.The decision is yours."
"At least let me enjoy the moment."
"For once,you have my support on this and I'm happy for you.Hopefully things will be even better since I've never seen you this happy before in my life."
"I hope it never ends too."

And up until this point in time,I still can't get it off my mind.It's bothering me,or rather,I make it bother myself.'We're not together,but we're with each other',that's how I describe it.And I don't even know what that means actually since they meant the same things.Maybe not,but that's how close they meant to me at least.I have put so much into this and I know that this has got to be the closest I can ever get to starting a new chapter in life,the only difference between this chapter compared to the other chapters is that this one could very well end with a happily ever after which of course,I can only dream about.And I'm doing everything I can to not let anything hurt my chances or tear apart everything that I've tried so hard to build.Especially not when I'm almost at the top.

And I know that if I do make my way to the top,it's not the ending.It's a brand new start to a whole new different road that takes me to some place I've never been before.But if I fail then it's over.I have never reached this stage before and all I can say is that I'm scared.I'm scared to lose the people that I have now.I'm scared to love and lose.I'm scared to fall again because I won't know how to pick myself up.I'm scared of everything.Especially not when I'm almost there.Should I risk it?Or should I just go for it?I want to be your last first kiss,your last first love and it's not inevitable...


Do you remember when we were just kids
And cardboard boxes took us miles from what we would miss
Schoolyard conversations taken to heart
And laughter took the place of everything we knew we were not

I wanna break every clock
The hands of time could never move again
We could stay in this moment (stay in this moment)
For the rest of our lives
Is it over now hey, is it over now

I wanna be your last, first kiss
That you'll ever have
I wanna be your last, first kiss

Amazing how life turns out the way that it does
We end up hurting the worst, the only ones we really love

I wanna break every clock
The hands of time could never move again
We could stay in this moment (stay in this moment)
For the rest of our lives
Is it over now hey, is it over now

I wanna be your last, first kiss
That you'll ever have
I wanna be your last, first kiss

Is it over now hey, is it over now
Is it over how hey, it's not over now

I wanna be your last, first kiss
That you'll ever have (that you'll ever have)
I wanna be your last, first love (that you'll ever have)
Till you're lying here beside me with arms and eyes open wide
I wanna be your last, first kiss for all time...


Inevitable by Anberlin.

Dance Floor Anthem...

Good Charlotte's new single DanceFloorAnthem,available at youtube.com.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xikG1eCuQoU&mode=related&search=

I love the heartbeat thing.But there are some really weird images as in,they look bad at some parts of the video.But I love the way they mix around with the synthesizers.And of course the very catchy song that just get you moving and it's really one of those 'feel good' songs.So everybody put up your hands along with the dance floor anthem...


She’s going out to forget they were together
All that time he was taking her for granted
She wants to see if there’s more
Than he gave she’s looking for

He calls her up
He’s trippin’ on the phone
Now he doesn’t want her out there and alone
Now he knows she’s moving it
Knows she’s using it
Now he’s losing it
She don’t care

Everybody
Put up your hands say
"I don’t wanna be in love, I don’t wanna be in love"
Feel the beat now
If you’ve got nothing left say
"I don’t wanna be in love, I don’t wanna be in love"
Back it up now
You’ve got a reason to live say
"I don’t wanna be in love, I don’t wanna be in love"
Feeling good now
Don’t be afraid to get down say
"I don’t wanna be in love, I don’t wanna be in love"

He was always giving her attention
Working hard to find the things she mentioned
He was dedicated
By most sucka’s hated
That girl was fine
But she didn’t appreciate him

She calls him up she’s trippin’ on the phone
Now he had to get up and he ain’t coming home
Now he’s trying to forget her
That's how he got with her
When he first met her
When they first got together

Everybody
Put up your hands say
"I don’t wanna be in love, I don’t wanna be in love"
Feel the beat now
If you’ve got nothing left say
"I don’t wanna be in love, I don’t wanna be in love"
Back it up now
You’ve got a reason to live say
"I don’t wanna be in love, I don’t wanna be in love"
Feeling good now
Don’t be afraid to get down say
"I don’t wanna be in love, I don’t wanna be in love"

To the beat
To the beat
To the beat
You got nothing to lose
Don’t be afraid to get down

We break up it’s something that we do now
Everyone has got to do it sometime
It’s okay
Let it go
Get out there and find someone

It’s too late to be trippin’ on the phone here
Get off the wire
Now everything is good here
Stop what you’re doing
You don’t wanna ruin
The chance that you got to
Find a new one

Everybody
Put up your hands say
"I don’t wanna be in love, I don’t wanna be in love"
Feel the beat now
If you’ve got nothing left say
"I don’t wanna be in love, I don’t wanna be in love"
Back it up now
You’ve got a reason to live say
"I don’t wanna be in love, I don’t wanna be in love"
Feeling good now
Don’t be afraid to get down say
"I don’t wanna be in love, I don’t wanna be in love"

Now you know what to do
So come on
Feelin’ good...


Dance Floor Anthem by Good Charlotte.

This Is The Night...

Well,I decided that this could very well be the night of everything that has been going my way from day one.I just have to tell you everything and we're still talking about it,even up until now 0213 which is way past bedtime.But I guess somethings are worth sacrificing for no matter what the outcome is.And this is the night...


When the world wasn't upside down
I could take all the time I had
But I'm not going to wait when a moment can vanish so fast
Cause every kiss is a kiss you can never get back

Lift me up in your eyes
If you told me that is what Heaven is, well, you'd be right
I've been waiting forever for this
This is the night

When the answer to all my dreams
Is as close as a touch away
Why am I here holding back what I'm trying to say?

Lift me up in your eyes
If you told me that is what Heaven is, well, you'd be right
Hold me close to your heart
I would go with you to the ends of the Earth and we'll fly
I've been waiting forever for this
This is the night

This is the night where we capture forever and our tomorrows begin
After tonight, we will never be lonely again

Lift me up in your eyes
If you told me that is what Heaven is, well, you'd be right
Hold me close to your heart
I would go with you to the ends of the Earth and we'll fly
I've been waiting forever for this
This is the night...


This Is The Night by Clay Aiken.

Collide...

Today is probably the best day of my life.Let's start off with what I went through in the morning.I woke up late and I rushed to get dressed and all that.I reached Parkway to get my stuff which I left for a day and my lunch.I stupidlt forgot to take my cash and all I can afford is a drink which I savour until the last drop.But it went uphill after that.Reached church pretty early and met Glenn and Priscilla in the canteen.They've got a little practice before the actual mass and I watched as one by one,the confirmands arrived.We had a little video screening of our 3 and half years of confirmation which brings back the memories.And yeah,lots of embarrassing pictures but hell,it's the memories that count.

Fast forward to the my testimonial in which I can't remember a thing now.I can't remember if I said anything wrongly,I can't remember if I missed any names which I'm supposed to say out and yeah,I can't remember how I did.Everyone said 'nice testimonial man' and that was enough to make me smile.Guess that was my moment of pride,to be up there sharing an inch of my personal life to the congregants no matter how nervous I felt.And the first move happened during the photo taking session.Just happened to be standing there and I felt a little tug at my hand.

So let the photos tell the story.




















On the way to Parkway.





















While waiting in the canteen.





















Me and Sophia.















Take two.















Me and Brian.We both picked Alexander as our confirmation name without knowing,cool.















Me and Gavin,one of the cool guys.















Me and the cantor,Glenn.




















Me and Aaron Chua.




















Me,Michelle Aw and Carisia.




















Bernadette and I.















The catechists and the youth facilitators.















The catechists,YFs,the priests and your grace,Archbishop Nicholas.














Take two.















Me and Shaun,the serious catechist and our level co-ordinator.He happens to be living across the street.















Me and Nicholas,the easy-going catechist.















Me and Mark,the father-catechist.




















Me and Jason,the cool catechist.















Me and Peter,my group's catechist and the funniest,quirkiest and weirdest catechist.




















The YFs.
From left to right: Edward,me,Andrew and Gerard.I wish Riko was here too.














Me and Bernie,our other lovely YF.















Whatever I brought home today.















The mass booklet.
















Save the best for last.Kathleen and I.


I gave her the stuff which I've been planning for the past two weeks or so.I hope you like it.Well,only we two knew what happened after that.Two incidents in fact.To say I'm happy is an understatement,it's beyond that by leaps and bounds.

Today is perhaps,the best day of my 16 years of life.Well,so far at the very least.Everything went smoothly and there are things which I'll never forget until the last breath of my life.But all good thing has to come to an end and I have to say a big farewell to most of these people whom I've spent the last three and a half years with.Memories good or bad,they'll forever be in my heart.I somehow find,you and I collide...


The dawn is breaking
A light shining through
You're barely waking
And I'm tangled up in you
Yeah

I'm open, you're closed
Where I follow, you'll go
I worry I won't see your face
Light up again

Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills my mind
I somehow find
You and I collide

I'm quiet you know
You make a first impression
I've found I'm scared
To know I'm always on your mind

Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the stars refuse to shine
Out of the back you fall in time
I somehow find
You and I collide

Don't stop here
I lost my place
I'm close behind

Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills your mind
You finally find
You and I collide
You finally find
You and I collide
You finally find
You and I collide...


Collide by Howie Day...

America...

Alright,I guess I've been missed.Yeah right.Anyway tomorrow's confirmation and hell I am scared and nervous like never before.Not only that,I can't quite believe it myself since everything seems to zoom past.It's like life is moving at a zillion miles per second and we don't quite get to enjoy the moment.The moment we try to,it marks the end and there goes the chance.But I did have a few seconds of joy today since my parents paid a visit while they had their transit here for 4 or 5 hours.They must have senses my anxiety to finally lay my hands on the cds that I ordered from US and all I can do is scream in delight as each cd is taken from the plastic bag making me feel better and better at the glance of them.

And to top it all up,I got myself Linkin Park's Minutes To Midnight on Thursday in which I was head banging to the whole night.Well not really,but still it's good stuff.Somehow,I love the song Shadow of the Day the most.It's like as if I can relate best to it but that doesn't mean the rest of the songs in the album sucked.And I got it with a free tee as well.Now that's a good buy alright.





















A rocking cd with a black tee to top it off.






















LP


So anyway,like I said,I got 6 freaking cds fresh from the United States of America along with a Hard Rock Cafe tee which is black with gold design,sounds hot.And looks hot too.My bro got a couple of tee too but nothing compared to mine of course.I got a guitar book and yeah,lots of good chocolate to indulge myself on in case I get depressed.I've got Blueprint for the Black Market, Never Take Friendship Personal and Cities(Special Edition) by Anberlin,Phantoms by Acceptance,Sing But Keep Going by Sherwood and All We Know Is Falling by paramore.I was introduced to these bands by Ryan so thanks man.






















Wooohooo!!!


I'm so loving the day.Notice I didn't write a thing about my results,I don't want to feel unhappy that's why.All I can say is I got more or less the same results as last term only worse grade but I'll work harder next term onwards,I promise.So yeah,let's not go into that shall we.Everything's ok in the house,since my mom took some time off this morning while she's here to clear all the havocs that we caused for the previous three weeks or so.And I salute them for being alive since they must be having jetlag considering it's night time in America when it's morning here.That's why I love them so much.

Tonight's FA Cup between ManUtd and Chelsea and I'm so not missing this for the world.Kathleen will be spending this evening at a concert which I'm guessing is just as good as football.And I'm hoping to have the final laugh by celebrating the victory over Chel$ki.Rumours has it that Chel$ki will be spending yet more cash on players and Terry leaving the club because he doesn't get paid as much as Sheva and Ballack who played like Forlan and Veron respectively.He's not impressed by the amount of results they produce compared to the truckloads of cash they're being fed per week and noone can deny the fact that they don't really deserve all that money.I can foresee Beckham's future in America being tenfolds better than them though you might argue that Major League Soccer is playground compared to English Premier League but at least Beckham is still performing and giving his all in Real Madrid.Now that's someone who's once idolised by many and now immortalised as legend.Product of ManUtd to the world of football.And one more in process of manufacturing,currently the number 7.


One day,when I grow up I would like to be successful enough to tour in America and I'll bring you along too.No doubt about it.I find travelling enjoyable and exciting though I know everyone hates the jetlag.And no doubt if you're big in America,you'll be up there with the best.That's my dream.And I'll make sure we share the good times with you by my side watching America...


What a drag it is
The shape I'm in
Well I go out somewhere
Then I come home again

I light a cigarette
'Cause I can't get no sleep
Theres nothing on the TV
Nothing on the radio
That means that much to me

All my life
Watching America
All my life
There's panic in America
Oh Oh Oh, Oh
There's trouble in America
Oh Oh Oh, Oh

Yesterday was easy
Happiness came and went
I got the movie script
But I don't know what it meant

I light a cigarette
'Cause I can't get no sleep
Theres nothing on the TV
Nothing on the radio
That means that much to me
Theres nothing on the TV
Nothing on the radio
That I can believe in

All my life
Watching America
All my life
There's panic in America
Oh Oh Oh, Oh
There's trouble in America
Oh Oh Oh, Oh
There's panic in America
Oh Oh Oh, Oh

Yesterday was easy
Yes I got the news
When you get it straight
But stand up you just can't lose
Give you my confidence
All my faith in life
Dont stand me up
Don't let me down
I need you tonight

To hold me, say you'll be here
To hold me, say you'll be here
To hold me, say you'll be here
To hold...

All my life
Watching America
All my life
There's panic in America
Oh Oh Oh, Oh
She's just in America
Oh Oh Oh, Oh

Tell me how does it feel
Tell me how does it feel
Tell me how does it feel
Tell me how does it feel...


America by Razorlight.

Thnks Fr Th Mmrs...

Ball De Play with some attention seeking girls and hot and sexy Amin,the guy in black.I wish Leroy was here.


Well the past few days has been great.Except for one the amount of rest I'm getting each day.I think the workshop by Adam Khoo's alright.It was enjoyable,memorable and I learnt a couple from there too.Hopefully,the methods taught there will work and help me in my studies.Speed reading,super memory and all that.But I particularly enjoyed the tiring 3 full days in school because of the trainers.Gary,Amin and Leroy.I can say 4A,4B and 4C enjoyed their presence more thann anything else.Though Gary showed up for only one miserable session.He made sure we know what to expect with the introduction to the whole workshop on Friday morning.

Amin and Leroy goes from then on joking around and making fools out of themselves.Let's just say it has got something to do with a Toyota Vios,carbon,car bun,parking in between lorries,stuck in a room not once but twice while trying to get to the loo,Mama Mia,Leroy 35-Zahrah 0, BURN,Leroy's crazy and wacky dad,Australia,lots and lots of bike accidents,hungry stomachs,Mina's curly hair and fat past,the number 3 during super memory and the best "*wail,don't have".That has become one of our most overused words throughout the whole batch.And it still is until this minute.Correction, until this second.He's got that weird accent when he said that and we've since copied him and made it one of our own lines.Simply hilarious.

Yesterday was kind of like an emo day for all.Well,it's more like night since we had the parents coming to the school and all that.One by one,the students took the mic and say a couple of words to anyone about anything and of course most of them goes to their parents whom they love ever so much.And everyone gave their support by cheering those who went up and not calling them by their nicknames,or rather father's name since parents are there.Tribute to Ball De Play too,that's cool.And people started crying and it spreads contagiously to those around them.And then we sang If We Hold On Together which was beautifully done since everyone took part in it.Had the finale by singing the school song acapella style as in without background music and all I can say is that it's louder than when the whole school was singing it during assemblies and this was just 5 classes from sec 4 mind you.Memories that won't be erased for quite a while.

And just in case you're wondering I'll be doing the testimonial for confirmation mass.My reaction was 'What' and the catechists asked me to present it in front of the batch for my first and last practice.All I can say is that I was shaking though it's only less than a hundred from the lot and I can imagine the church having a full attendance.The thoughts of it just numbs my senses.It's scary and it would be nerve-wrecking.Probably one of the scariest experience ever since most of these people watching me would not know who the heck I am.I won't be surprised if I woke up with cold feet on that day but I'll make sure I made difference to my life and do something to constantly challenge myself.

And I got back most of my results today.It was bad,what I meant by bad is I passed but the marks are crap.The bad news,the sciences and Poa papers aren't given out yet.So tomorrow I'll be dead.The good news is the fact that I topped the class in my composition.23/30.How cool is that.I have Cristiano to thank now for being an inspiration.I feel so happy about it that no other marks in the day matters since for once I top the class.And Eugene of course,seeing him ace the Oral Exam like a piece of chicken feed.But all I can say was that the topic is close to heart,which is why I can relate to it so easily.I mean,it's easy to express myself in that sense rather than being another party to the whole story.It's more direct that way and luckily I know a bit of Cristiano's life.Told you a little research isn't as bad as you would have thought.Who knows when you might need them.I swear if the exams were to give a different topic,I wouldn't have got the marks that I do now.I'm clenching my fist and I know I've got to make sure that spot is mine and mine alone.I'll make sure I maintain my composition and improve the others.

I just realised I've got about 5 months left before saying goodbye to my people in school.That's really sad.And I got to enjoy every moment that I have left with these people who's mould me into who I am today.No matter how lowly people think of us in terms of school name,I think if I were to get to another school,I wouldn't be enjoying my life now.Thnks fr th mmrs...


I'm gonna make you bend and break
(It sends you to me without wait)
Say a prayer but let the good times roll
In case God doesn't show
(Let the good times roll, let the good times roll)
And I want these words to make things right
But it's the wrongs that make the words come to life
"Who does he think he is?"
If that's the worst you got
Better put your fingers back to the keys

One night and one more time
Thanks for the memories
Even though they weren't so great
"He tastes like you only sweeter"
One night, yeah, and one more time
Thanks for the memories, thanks for the memories
"He, he tastes like you only sweeter"

Been looking forward to the future
But my eyesight is going bad
And this crystal ball
It's always cloudy except for (except for)
When you look into the past (look into the past)
One night stand (one night stand off)

One night and one more time
Thanks for the memories
Even though they weren't so great
"He tastes like you only sweeter"
One night, yeah, and one more time
Thanks for the memories, thanks for the memories
"He, he tastes like you only sweeter"

They say I only think in the form of crunching numbers
In hotel rooms collecting page six lovers
Get me out of my mind and get you out of those clothes
I'm a liner away from getting you into the mood, whoa

One night and one more time
Thanks for the memories
Even though they weren't so great
"He tastes like you only sweeter"
One night, yeah, and one more time
Thanks for the memories, thanks for the memories
"He, he tastes like you only sweeter"

One night and one more time (One more night, one more time)
Thanks for the memories
Even though they weren't so great
"He tastes like you only sweeter"
One night, yeah, and one more time (One more night, one more time)
Thanks for the memories, thanks for the memories
"He, he tastes like you only sweeter"...


Thnks Fr Th Mmrs by Fall Out Boy.

When I Think Of You...

Had another round of Adam Khoo's workshop today.All I can say is that if class is like this,it would probably turn school upside down.I mean,these instructors are highly successful people who earns more cash than many of those working in my school.They earn 5 digits in a month and I was flabbergasted.I mean,I could give some inspirational talk to and I would be satisfied with 4 figures and these people has got countless zeros in their bank account.But what makes these people unique is that these people has got confidence high up in cloud nine and jokes that are funny no matter how unfunny they are.I mean seriously,I can't quite control myself after their back to back jokes about insulting one another behind each other's back.And we students played a part too,we made sure we make them say something nasty about each other or at least indirectly offensive and insulting.And we kept making fun of their stupidity,yes these people are geniuses in their own right but though they make us look extremely inferior especially when they talk,we made sure they look stupid no matter what or who.We've had three speakers so far and they're on 'good terms'.

There was this one part this afternoon right before the break where everyone went into ultimate,extreme and 'trance-like' emo mood because the speakers talked about reflections and all that.I can hear so many people weeping their uncotrollable tears off like running tap while others just sat there stoned.I wasn't stoned,but I wasn't crying either for the first time.Normally,I would at least shed a tear whenever the topic of famiy comes about because though I'm not from what you call a broken home,it's nearly impossible to avoid the fact that I rarely see my dad and at times it will feel like he never really existed.But it's not that I don't care about him.I've got nothing personal against him other than the fact that he never spend much time with us.Other than that,he's doing a good job infact he's doing the perfect job.

We watched clips from Rocky3 last night and today was Coach Carter and I've got no preference really.They're pretty much telling the same tale but each with a different ending.It's quite tiring too having your butt glued on the seat for the whole day and I have a reason why my butt is square if I'm asked in the future.It's like the mixture of butt cramps and fatique combined into one especially when you didn't get a good sleep the day before.I know because I didn't really count the sleep I had last night as a sleep.I barely sunk my eyes in and then I had to wake up and I was in serious zombie mode even after I bathed.I slept again for about 15 mins before I got my breakfast and luckily I was on time because I was prepared to come to the ava room with everyone's eyes watching me like as though I'm a criminal getting my sentence today.

I guess I can get a clearer picture of who I'll be in the future,or at least what I want to be when I grow up.The image is still blurry but it's clearing,just slightly.And at the same time I got myself nicknamed probably the Good Charlotte fanatic by the man who's playing the music,Atheous.I kept requesting for Good Charlotte's song to be played during breaks that I bet he's sick of me already.And thankfully,I got myself the song Radios In Heaven by Plain White T's which is damn hot.And not too long ago I got The Calling's album II from Asyraf.Thanks Alleycat and the now Benji Madden lookalike more like just the hairstyle.The Calling's album is pretty hot stuff.It's very easy to listen too and the rhythms are pretty catchy too.Their three singles are addictive for sure.

Don't think you've a 100% recovered from whatever you went through but it's getting better,I hope.And you know what,during one of the exercises we did during the workshop and we have to think of the most important person in my life,you came into my mind.And I can't really weigh which to pick,you or my family.And that's when I realised that the story of putting people's name in stories will not help.Like remember your wife or girlfriend asking you who you would save if they're drowning at the same time.I can't make up my mind.It's hard when you measure what others have to done to you in a shorter period of time compared to those who have a 'friends since the day I was born' or mostly family members.

Why am I so negative-minded?I have no answer to that question either.I'm assuming it's just one of theose rhetorical questions.Events + Response = Outcome see I told you I learned something during the past two days of workshop.Anyway it's just how I normally handle things I guess.I'm so used to it.When I cross my arms,it's always my right hand over the left and when I tried to do the other way,it just feels weird and uncomfortable.I guess it's the same concept.If you were t try and change a habit,it's difficult.And when you're so used to dealing with some events and when asked to do so,you will be doing the exact same thing that you've done the past few times.So it's better to change those bad habits now before they get even harder.

Anyway,you're the most important someone in my life so far excluding those blood ties that I have with my families.You've made me enjoy life the way never did before.And it's incredible because we can actually count the number of weeks that passed us by with our fingers.It just got me speechless at this moment because you seem to be holding something from me though it's probably nothing important to me but the truth is,nothing is unimportant unless you make it out to be.And though I've said countless times that I'm always there for you,you don't really share it openly.I mean,that isn't a bad thing because sometimes you just want to solve some problems on our won,I've experienced that too many times.And I respect your decision and you of course.I still care no matter what happens.And I got to confess that when I think of you,the first thing I'll do is smile and the day becomes a good day...


Youre my past, my future
My all, my everything
My six in the morning when the clock rings
and I open up my eyes to a new day
My laughs, my frowns
My ups, my downs
Its a feeling that you get when you know that somethings true
When I think of love I think of you

Im looking at you while your sleeping here beside me,
Oh, mere words cant explain the love I have inside
Its more than just a physical thing, I know
Its something like a spiritual connection
I feel it in my soul, heart and mind

Youre my past, my future
My all, my everything
My six in the morning when the clock rings
and I open up my eyes to a new day
My laughs, my frowns
My ups, my downs
Its a feeling that you get when you know that somethings true
When I think of love I think of you

Your beautiful like the colours of the rainbow
Warm heated like the rays of the sun on summer days
All I got to do is look into your eyes to lose myself
Your the substance of my dreams, epitomy of women
The only one I truly call mine

The sweetest thing is what you are
From you, I'll never be to far,
Please say forever you will stay beside me


Youre my past, my future
My all, my everything
My six in the morning when the clock rings
and I open up my eyes to a new day
My laughs, my frowns
My ups, my downs
Its a feeling that you get when you know that somethings true
When I think of love I think of you

Oohh when I think of love I think of you
Baby I love you, baby I need you

Youre my past, my future
My all, my everything
My six in the morning when the clock rings
and I open up my eyes to a new day
My laughs, my frowns
My ups, my downs
Its a feeling that you get when you know that somethings true
When I think of love I think of you...

When I Think Of You be Lee Ryan.

What A Difference A Day Made...

Exams are finally over and I can shout to the world that I'm extremely excited to have the week enjoying myself while my parents are out of town.Well,might as well since I won't get to do this often anyway right?I've been planning myself for the upcoming week and roughly got an idea of what I'll do to keep myself entertained.And I got a really bad blister at my right foot that hurts real bad thanks to the Epl on Thursday.Had Adam Khoo Workshop today in which I luckily remembered to bring my long-sleeve shirt or else I would have frozen to death in the room for the whole day.It's better than I expected,at least there's humour to add the fun in it.

Anyway,Kathleen is back.Hip hip hooray.Now that's a soul revival all by itself.My parent's are going to San Francisco tomorrow after having all the fun in world.I'm envious,I mean everything beats exams or studying big time.Crap,why am I saying all this?It's not like it's going to help.Or change the fact that I'll still have to study for next couple of years and everyday is a learning experience already.


Take good care of yourself because everything just passes so fast.And it's just weird talking to someone who's not acting like themselves.I really really hope you're alright like you said you're.It just doesn't feel like yourself and I'm missing the you back then.I'm always here for you and I'm sure it's become such a common phrase now that I overused it but that's just the plain truth.I just wish I could make you better this time.And I promise I won't be thinking about that because I personally don't want anything to change to.What a difference a day made...



What a difference a day made
Twenty four little hours
Brought the sun and the flowers
Where there used to be rain
My yesterday was blue dear
Today I'm a part of you dear
My lonely nights are through dear
Since you said you were mine

Oh, what a difference a day made
There's a rainbow before me
Skies above can't be stormy
Since that moment of bliss
That thrilling kiss
It's heaven when you find romance on your menu
What a difference a day made
And the difference is you
Is you

My yesterday was blue dear
Still I'm a part of you dear
My lonely nights are through dear
Since you said you were mine
Oh, what a difference a day made
There's a rainbow before me
Skies above can't be stormy
Since that moment of bliss
That thrilling kiss
It's heaven when you find romance on your menu
What a difference a day made
And the difference is you
Is you
Is you...


What A Difference A Day Made by Jamie Cullum.

Waiting For You...

Today is wednesday,but I swear it feels like a friday to me.Maybe it's because I'm released early today since there's only a paper.This week has been alright so far I guess,though I feel something amiss,or rather someone.And it's none other than Kathleen,she'll be back in two days time so three cheers to that.

What better way to kick start the week than with the sports page early in the morning.ManUtd are finally crowned the champions,after three years of hell.I have to salute Sir Alex for his faith in his men,I said men because the boys have successfully got that tag off and has grown,not just in terms of age.I will say the man who's credited with being the best player is none other than Cristiano but there's only one man who works behind the scenes of the win.That man is Michael Carrick,he's underrated and people don't like him because he's filling in the shoes and jersey number of Roy Keane but just because he doesn't tackle like Roy doesn't mean he's useless.

If you were to look at the way he manipulate the ball like child's play,passing it short and wide and all over the pitch.It's incredible really.His passes are laser guided and yes,he doesn't have the aggression of Keane or any other greats playing in the heart of the midfield but what he brings is calmness which the team needs especially when they get too eager to score a goal.I can compare him to someone like Pirlo of Milan without the dead ball ability.People just don't give him credit because he's overshadowed by the prodigies of ManUtd being the Rooney and Ronaldo combination.Look at his goals against AS Roma,they're both world class strikes and though he isn't the fiercest of shooters,he makes it up with all of his reading of the ball and work rate.And it's only his first season in ManUtd so when there's reports that ManUtd is trying to get Owen Hargreaves,I say no way.I believe that Carrick needs the support and faith of the people and not someone breathing down his neck in the form of Hargreaves who already stole his spot in England's first eleven.No offence to Hargreaves becuse his defensive qualities is there for everyone to see but I'm more than satisfied with the current number 16,he's my unsung hero.

I'll give credit where it's due so here's one to Jose Mourinho and his troops.For once Chelsea lost graciously and their performance in Emirates Stadium will remind us of the courage of Chelsea and all that thanks to Jose's effort in building the team with unity and spirit as the foundations.Their never say die attitude will be saluted by me no matter how big a fan of ManUtd am I.If Roman Abramovich is reading this,you better make sure that man stays or Chelsea is going down and for proof just look at Real Madrid.They sacked Vicente Del Bosque after a so-so season in which Real won the league and look at the state the club got into.Now they're improving under Capello but his head is still on the chopping block.But I can understand Capello's case,he has to work with people he barely knows and expects to win big which takes time.And Real is forced to adapt to a more defensive tactic when Madrid is always known for their attack.I remember their chairman said "If the opponent score 6 goals,then we'll score 8."

Anyway,I was in such a good mood that I can't remember what happened on Monday other than in the morning.I texted what I thought was the last message before I get to talk to Kathleen again in five days time.Let's just say what she wrote is confidential and it's got me in a better mood than I already was,imagine that.Tuesday,I had POA paper 1 in which I practically guessed all 30 questions.Bad sign eh?Then went for Epl like no other and got home really shagged.I was tempted to sleep but I've got other ideas in mind.Got back to my guitar and started playing stuff for almost the whole day.Then I received a shocking message,it's from Kathleen and I go "Woohoo."She never fails to surprise me all the time.Though that was the only message from her,that's more than enough to put the smiles back on my face.

Had Mother Tongue paper 2 just now and I'm uncertain on how it went.And tomorrow's the final day of mid-year,I've got a freaking four papers to sit for.Maths paper1,combined biology and chemistry paper 1 and listening comprehension in the until the late morning and just when I thought I can party the day away,I've got O level trial paper for mother tongue.Crap.I just hope I don't flunk them,that's all.It's going to be another long day tomorrow,sigh.God knows how I can actually survive life for this long.


I went to Mac at Parkway after my paper and I got myself a Big Breakfast.That's how early I was.And here I am blogging.A few days ago,someone asked me if I was in love.I can't really say I said the truth because at that time I don't know for sure either.And I can't just leave the question hanging right?So I said no.But I'm still in the same state as I was then I guess.I still have no answer to that question because right now,I'm enjoying just being carefree.All I care about is everyone around me.I'd be lying if I say I don't love a particular someone but it's too hard to say.I'm just treating that someone differently than any other people and is ranked the top few in the priority list.That I can't deny.But at times,I feel what has happened is so surreal and too much of a good thing.Well that's just me,I've always known to be doubting myself all the time.

So if you're reading this,I'm sure you'll know what to do with me.But so far,I've been thinking what you said is what you honestly feel and if that's the case then for once in my life,I'll be sure about something.They say actions speaks louder than words and I've been screaming my lungs out with words that's deep in meanings.But in reality I'm hiding behind a wall,afraid to ruin that image.Sooner or later,I'll have to show the world that my words aren't just empty promises.I'm still waiting for you...


I knew you for just a while before you left
You were young and full of happiness
I wish I could hear you laugh
And I wonder if you're hanging out
Now that you're somewhere else
Some place sweeter
Some place better
Some place far away fom us

When you're gone...
But you sleep forever now(when you're gone)
And I am waiting for you
(I don't want to be here alone)
When you're gone...
But you sleep forever now(when you're gone)
And I am waiting for you
(I don't to be here alone anymore)

Everything seems diferent now
Bittersweet and funny how
Things have turned out unexpectedly
And you notice how I'm counting down
All the days and nights from now
Until the day I see you eventually

When you're gone...
But you sleep forever now(when you're gone)
And I am waiting for you
(I don't want to be here alone)
When you're gone...
But you sleep forever now(when you're gone)
And I am waiting for you
(I don't want to be here alone)
When you're gone...
But you sleep forever now(when you're gone)
And I am waiting for you
(I don't want to be here alone)
When you're gone...
But you sleep forever now(when you're gone)
And I am waiting for you
(I don't want to be here alone)
When you're gone...
But you sleep forever now(when you're gone)
And I am waiting for you
(I don't to be here alone anymore)

La,lala,la,lala la la
La,lala,la,lala la la
La,lala,la,lala la la

La,lala,la,lala la la
La,lala,la,lala la la
La,lala,la,lala la la...


Waiting For You by West Grand Boulevard.

Brighter Than Sunshine...

Well,I'm pissed now that blogger lost my freaking long post.Let's start from scratch again then,trying to remember what I wrote.Nothing much happened on Monday and Tuesday although the latter is Labour Day and jokingly means that it's the day when babies are supposed to be born.Anyway,I did the ritual of laundry,ironing and all that.Went for lunch at Parkway and Raddy Avramovic sat opposite me while I was having my lunch.Well,I don't really support Singapore but hey,it doesn't matter right?

Went home early from school on Wednesday and what do I spend the time on?Sleeping.I'm having exams yet I'm being such a bum.Anyway,I managed to catch more sleep that night and woke up on thursday feeling shagged.ManUtd got whacked 3-0 by Milan is the hot topic of the day.Everyone in school teased me.And to make it worse,there's History and Maths paper 2.I was like the only person to do the topic on China since practically everyone did Japan.And I couldn't complete the last question for source based in time.Crap.Maths paper 2 was a killer.My mind went blank the moment I flipped the first page and I know that if I were to pass,it would only by a tiny margin.And there still the possibility of failing.Got home early yet again to catch even more sleep.

Guess what do I have the next day?It's English paper 2 and my favourite subject of all-time,Chemistry.I have never been able to achieve anything more than an F9 since I took that subject,I didn't have much of a choice anyway since it's compulsory in my school.The first passage was a killer for English.I couldn't understand the story and I finished the paper with 30 minutes to spare,strangely.Normally I would be rushing through the dying the seconds finishing up my summary and this time,I did my summary without even doing a draft.I just felt confident writing it down,but that doesn't mean I'm confident about ace-ing the paper.And chemistry,what more can I say?I know I can get at least one mark and some last minute revision has enabled me to do most of the questions though usually the most refers to the number of blanks I leave as answers.

Went to Pastamania for lunch with YongSiang and Ryan after that.They're evil people.They made fun out of people.And I'm such an angel,I didn't say anything bad while they were laughing their asses off.Then we went for Winning Eleven and when Ryan went home,YongSiang and I had EPL to de-stress.Takeaway dinner and went back home after that.Did the draft of my testimonial and called Peter soon after to ask for opinions.He told me something which impact-ed me the most."To me,it will be weird not reading a testimonial that's both emotional and personal since it's written by you."Something like that.And it totally made me so sure of just writing what I am and not what others want me to be.

Also,it made me realise that blog isn't just a place for you to express yourself or a journal as others describe it.It's more than that.It's a chance to show your personality and be honest to yourself and the world.Peter is one who can read me like an open book just by reading my posts.He captures every emotion I that I try to instil in every sentence and every word that I use.He just seem to know what I'm going through at the point of every paragraph in my posts that it's hard for me not to bring matters up to him and expects him to solve my problems.

Well,today's the first day I left the house in the afternoon without carrying my bible along like I normally do on Saturdays.I went to Parkway,yet again, to grab my lunch at Yoshinoya since I missed vegetables.And the fact that my parents are planning to visit Niagara Falls while I sit at home with no life,makes me rather annoyed.Anyway,I went home to catch ManUtd's victory over ManCity and yeah,we've got one hand on the trophy.And I convert to an Arsenal fan for a day since Chelsea's up against them.I bet Alex and the boys will be in Emirates Stadium itself too catch the game or at least the dressing room in Old Trafford.Whichever ones they prefer.Sadly,Kathleen will be away for level camp for the whole of next weekdays.It's going to be a long week next week.



The words that was exhanged yesterday was "I-can't-describe-it".The feeling I felt when I first read it was simply out of this world.To say I melted is an understatement.I can't help reading it every chance I have for the whole of today and I can't get it off my mind.I've found the reason why I've been smiling more often these days and no longer complaining about how unfair the world is or how much the world hates me.Gone are the days when I chant 'the world is black' when something happens.You made me see things in a different light and I can't thank you enough for that.Everyday is a good day because I get to spend them with you,though not through physical presence.Everything burns brighter than sunshine since the moment I knew you...



I never understood before
I never knew what love was for
My heart was broke, my head was sore
What a feeling

Tied up in ancient history
I didn't believe in destiny
I look up you're standing next to me
What a feeling

What a feeling in my soul
Love burns brighter than sunshine
Brighter than sunshine
Let the rain fall, I don't care
I'm yours and suddenly you're mine
Suddenly you're mine
And it's brighter than sunshine

I never saw it happening
I'd given up and given in
I just couldn't take the hurt again
What a feeling

I didn't have the strength to fight
Suddenly you seemed so right
Me and you
What a feeling

What a feeling in my soul
Love burns brighter than sunshine
It's brighter than sunshine
Let the rain fall, I don't care
I'm yours and suddenly you're mine
Suddenly you're mine

And it's brighter than the sun
It's brighter than the sun
It's brighter than the sun, sun, shine

Love will remain a mystery
But give me your hand and you will see
Your heart is keeping time with me

What a feeling in my soul
Love burns brighter than sunshine
It's brighter than sunshine
Let the rain fall, I don't care
I'm yours and suddenly you're mine
Suddenly you're mine

I got a feeling in my soul
Love burns brighter than sunshine
It's brighter than sunshine
Let the rain fall, I don't care
I'm yours and suddenly you're mine
Suddenly you're mine
And it's brighter than sunshine...


Brighter Than Sunshine by Aqualung.